More Than I Say Out Loud

It's November Already!

2011-11-09T13:14:00.000-05:00

And I can't believe I'm surprised. October is the busiest time of year for me. We've got our wedding anniversary (9 years. Whut?) Two birthdays and Halloween all in one week. This year we added a bowling party and Scottish in-laws to the mix. And the volunteer face painting of 1,000 children. And some regular painting drama in our bathroom and soccer and yoga and more parties, and gifts and oh on my kid's 5th birthday, I snipped the tip of his finger practically off with a pair of scissors as I was cutting a gift ribbon. Blood all over the LEGO. Tears, shock, guilt guilt guilt, Cars 2 Band-aid.

Mother of the year!

I've missed you, dear reader and I'm on this blogging business. I have so much to talk about and one of those things is NCTE/ALAN 2011.

I'm off to Chicago to talk and sign and panel it up with David Levithan and John Green and some other badasses.

There is also: BUILDING BLUEPRINTS FOR BETTER GIRLS.

And BEGINNERS.

I'm going to try and do a semi-weekly book rave of a book I love. If I don't like a book, you will never know about it. That's not how I roll. I'm from the if you can't say something good school.

It's like when my kid got bit after school yesterday. (And I mean bit. Silver dollar sized bruise on his skinny little thigh.) My husband was all outraged and furious and heads will roll! But I know the kid. I know his mom. Maybe he was just hungry. And I always think about the biter's poor mother and so when it comes to talking about books- I'm the biter's mother.

Am I making sense?

xoxo

Skunks

2011-09-30T09:32:00.000-04:00

Skunks have invaded my upper Manhattan neighborhood and I love it. If you are out at night up here and the moon is high and you are returning from the Associated with organic milk at 9:00 for the kids' breakfast in the morning, you might see one or two skulking about between parked cars or through the co-op on the corner's bushes.

Photo by fieldsbh

They are totally cute. Because of the Wild Kratts, I know that they are related (cousins, actually) of the weasel and badger.

When we got to the subway elevator (yes, I live in a magical land!) it smelled of: Skunk. And the kids and I loved it and it kind of made my day and the attendant smiled and said, "yeah they were in here."

I love skunks. I love the smell of skunk and also the smell of gasoline.

On Freaking Fire!

2011-09-29T12:31:00.001-04:00

"Success isn't a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire."

-- Arnold H. Glasow

So.

My Day

At 7:30 a.m. I drag the 5 year old to the kindergarten at the highest point in Manhattan and then drag the little one to his daycare at the bottom of the hill and I go half way back up a kind of hill and wait for the BX7 bus. On the bus I try and get a seat, the solo kind in the front, and check my email on my iphone. 30 minutes later (around 8:30a.m.) I wind up at this cafe in Inwood which is like any awesome cafe in Brooklyn but closer to where I live.

I go to the bathroom and put lipstick on.

I get a coffee, sometimes with a little cow.

Sometimes not.

I find a table either by the window or in the corner by the kitchen.

I take a picture of my coffee and tweet it.

I open up my Macintosh device collection of iphone, ipod touch, and the laptop that will not die.

I find a good station on Pandora- Lou Reed or David Bowie (they fit this book best so far).

I ass around for half an hour.

Then I meditate a bit.

Then I write.

AndthisbookispracticallywritingitselfbutnotreallyandIhopeit'sgoodIhopeit'sgoodIhopeit'sgood.

Three hours later I pack up, and take the bus home.

I make dinner at 3pm or so.

Pick up the kids at 4:30/5:00.

Home.

Bath.

Dinner.

Teeth.

Story.

Bed.

Wine.

Book.

Bed.

Voila! This is my life!

And I love it but whoa. I left a LOT out (laundry, reading series curating, bathing, yoga, sleep, laundry laundry laundry, lunch with agent, readings, blogging, facebook, mom dad, Wild Kratts, Halloween costume planning, soccer, NCTE planning, John Green meeting nerves, haircut, hair dye, pedicure, finding the one umbrella that isn't broken that is in the way back of the closet and then it didn't even rain this morning, Big Bird doll for the baby or he won't take a nap at day care, gluten free cooking for fun and profit. I could go on but I don't want to BORE you...)

Why not follow me on twitter? @ArlainaT

New look for blog soon.

xoxo

And now a word about Scotland...

2011-09-23T12:29:00.001-04:00

My husband is from Scotland and I love it there. I also love how much the Scots love books and reading. My father in law reads about 5 newspapers a day and their libraries are busy and not because homeless people are living in them, either. My mother in law is a huge murder-mystery fan and my brother-in-law reads a book a day practically. My husband? Well, is a political/history of whiskey/cultural criticism of the health care system for 10 minutes before bed type of guy. At least he's reading!

Here is a smashing photo of my handsome brother in law reading And Then Things Fall Apart on the glistening greens of St. Andrews. Thanks to him and my other family there, my sales numbers show a spike in Scotland.

This a short list of my favorite Scottish writers:

J.K. Rowling

Iain Banks

Irvine Welsh

Ali Smith

James Kelman

Robert Louis Stevenson

Ian Rankin

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Alasdair Grey

A.L. Kennedy

Muriel Spark

Alan Warner (The Sopranos and Morvern Callar)

But what I'm getting at here is that the Scots seem to still be in a passionate love affair with books. Events as the Edinburgh Book Festival SELL OUT. There's like, people scalping tickets to see some woman in glasses talk about her BOOK for half an hour. And then there was some artist leaving mysterious book sculptures in libraries, little gifts that said "I love you, books," all over Edinburgh.

I'm still waiting for this kind of thing at my local library, which I am slowly, despite the lack of mysterious book sculptures, falling in love with all over again.

SIGH SIGH SIGH

2011-09-19T11:13:00.001-04:00

Hey there. So my real life grandma is 88 years old. My other real life grandma is 90. I did some kind of weird Frankenstein monster sewing up of the best and weirdest parts of both of them and added a lot of made up stuff to create the Gram character in And Then Things Fall Apart.

I am terribly lucky to have both my grandmothers alive and relatively healthy. But one of them (the brunette) fell and broke her leg last week and it's freaking me out. Distracting me really. I'm not near her and can't visit really and am just thinking about the meaning of life, and time, and death and all kinds of other cheery things that are totally depressing me. She's OK- however OK an 88 year old woman with a broken and pinned together thigh can be.

SIGH SIGH SIGH it's all I'm doing lately.

Booklist had a little heart attack of love over And Then Things Fall Apart which is insanely good news. They even liked Keek's poetry. Shocking, I know! And I have some awesome and rabid Keek fans out there who have made themselves known to me through the magic of the internet. Which is also good news. (MWAH! You know who you are...)

I'm going to a fancy conference in November with the loves of my life, English Teachers, and I'm planning not one but two birthday parties for those lovable and scrappy tykes of mine. And oh I'm supposed to be writing a book and I kind of am but not in the way I would like. But I'm doing it in a fashion... and will sputter along until it clunks into my brain properly and then writes itself.

And here we are. Fall is upon us, pumpkin spiced lattes are on offer at various latte bars around the city and school is in full swing. My 4.75 year old loves to play chess (!) on my iphone (?!) after school, when his homework is complete (?!). SIGH SIGH SIGH! The other one says please and thank you and fits into a spiffy pair of flannel pyjamas from Scotland.

So below is a sensational little book trailer for And Then Things Fall Apart that someone other than me made. I came upon it quite on accident and I think it is totally cool! I might try and make one myself on animoto. Or maybe on imovie, or I dunno. I didn't think I needed one but I think it might me kind of fun to actually make one! And I will do anything except write a new book so. There was some acclaimed writer of note whose name I don't remember who famously outfitted his writing chair with a seatbelt and would STRAP HIMSELF IN to write. It's not that I don't love writing. Oh- we are in love, writing and I- it's just--- well. Stay tuned...

And remember: A man a plan a canal, Panama!

More Evidence That I am the Geekiest Girl in the World

2011-09-08T21:58:00.002-04:00

I love stamps, OK.

I'm like, INTO them and if I were a little different I would collect them. I would store them in elaborate leather bound albums that I would occasionally drag out of cold storage only to gaze at each frame adoringly through a magnifying glass with a mother-of-pearl handle. I'm one of those annoying people in front of you at the post office who ask the desk clerk --"got anything interesting back there?" while you are late for work and just need a money order to pay your landlord since your checks ran out. I still swoon over the effing GRETA GARBO stamps from a few years back, the Ronald Reagan stamps that my ultra-liberal pals used as postage on their annual holiday newsletter, the Marilyn Monroe and Elvis stamps that have never been separated from each other and nestle like lovers in glassine envelopes in my office drawer.

I don't use the "good stamps" (yes there's good stamps and so-so stamps and bad stamps- I'm looking at you, "forever" liberty bell) to post the cable and electric bill. You know I like you if you get oversized artsy stamps or better yet, an eclectic mix of squash blossom 1 centers, GRETA GARBO, Tito Puente and whatever else tickled my fancy that morning- an insane collection of geekdom in the upper right hand corner.

So, dear reader, imagine my surprise and delight to learn about my beloved and beleaguered US Postal Service's latest offering (er for next year, if they are still in business):

And yes of course, Sylvia's included, much to my delight. And Cummings, Brooks, Bishop, and Levertov! Of course, the USPS adores writers- we spend millions of dollars a year on postage of manuscripts, blog giveaways, editor gifts, bookmark peddling, agent love letters and etc. I'm there at least four times a month and each time EVERY TIME I spend 40 bucks a pop on fancy stamps I don't really need... because I have a serious stamp problem and when I say problem I'm not kidding.

But I can't support the whole operation alone, people. Go. Write a letter. Send your mom a gift, why not send every 5 year old you know a Good Luck in Kindergarten card? Your post office NEEDS you!

I'm going there tomorrow. Can I get you anything?

You, Moonface Tibensky, are no John Green

2011-08-29T16:06:00.006-04:00

Moonface is my nickname for myself when my face, especially on tv or video is as illuminated, white, and round as the effing moon. I know I shouldn't be so hard on myself. I should be grateful that I even have a head, moony or otherwise, and that there are people that actually want to record whatever I have to say forever on digital film...

Being in Chicago was amazing and hilarious. I love it there and now I'm back in New York and totally homesick. While there I paid a visit to my hometown La Grange Public Library where I met the lovely and amazing Noel Zethmayr, head of young adult services. And then she interviewed me and I went on and on and on about And Then Things Fall Apart and reading and writing and etc.

And it is on YouTube and now, here...

Noel was cool to talk with and really interesting and funny and smart. I gave her some Sylvia Plath pins as a parting gift and she was so punk rock she put them on her shirt sleeve!

Hope you weren't bored to death watching the video. I'm a little in love with John Green and his vlog is really and truly entertaining. I'm working on it...

Winners! Rockers! Writers!

2011-08-22T13:40:00.005-04:00

Oh dear Random.org thank you so much for randomizing the winners of the Sofa King Amazing And Then Things Fall Apart Giveaway!

BrittLit and Pantalones... email me your info (like, privately) and I'll shoot your loot out to you asap!

Thanks to everyone for following and signing up to win and just- I dunno- for being so great!

While I'm at it, feel free to rate And Then Things Fall Apart on Amazon and/or Goodreads. Every Star Counts!

In other great and fun news, I wanted to let you know about this interview I did with Stephanie Kuehnert at her blog, Life, Words, & Rock 'N Roll. It came out last week but here it is in all its glory. Ozzy Osbourne, Africa, writing... it's all in there. We met for lunch when I was in Chicago for a signing and we ate organic chips and salsa at this restaurant that was ALSO a house. It was fun and a great break from my family to talk about writing and writing and writing with someone who was way more punk rock than me. Thanks for everything, Stephanie.

100th POST and a HUGE GIVEAWAY that is SOFA KING HUGE I Can Hardly Stand it!

2011-08-12T15:39:00.008-04:00

I am alive!

And have now graduated with the publication of AND THEN THINGS FALL APART from "Writer" to... say it with me... "Author."

I have had enough experiences the past two weeks to blog about for a lifetime. There are photos, interviews, videos (!), announcements, tearjerking coincidences and etc.

This does not even include all the guest blogging I've been doing and totally digging.

Thanks for all the great reviews, savvy readers of mystery, it makes me feel like I'm onto something with this writing thing.

Meanwhile... This is my 100th post (I know! I can't believe it either) and I wanted to really live it up and give fun crap away to those who come knocking.

This amazing and heart breaking giveaway of staggering genius shall include:

One (1) signed copy of a AND THEN THINGS FALL APART
One (1) hand made hideously ugly and one of a kind AND THEN THINGS FALL APART soapdish
Four (4) Punk Rock Sylvia Plath button pins
One (!) Sylvia Plath stick mask from the AND THEN THINGS FALL APART Book Launch Event at Books of Wonder
Eight (8) signed bookmarks for you to pass around to your most amazing friends and librarians

All you have to do is become a follower of my blog (if you are not already, my darling) AND (as well as) leave a comment in this post's comments. I will use some sort of randomizing application to choose not one but TWO (2) lucky winners!!

What are you waiting for? You will have until August 20th to enter. (Shipping is US only...)

This is like, my first contest. It may be my last... so don't miss out!

xoxo

It's Like a Birthday, but Weirder

2011-07-26T12:42:00.006-04:00

Today, Tuesday, July 26, 2011 is the official pub date of

And Then Things Fall Apart.

I'm getting ready for the book launch and thought I should toss something at my very own blog...

Thanks to everyone and when I'm not so harried and emotional, I will post a real entry.

And thanks too for all the following and insane love on Twitter! It's like getting love notes tossed at my desk all day long... (@ArlainaT)

To tide you over, my pal Nova Ren Suma has an interview she did with me up on her blog.

And me talking about influential YA books over at Alisia Leavitt's cool blog too!

XOXOXO

Blog Tour! So Far!

2011-07-22T11:58:00.008-04:00

And Then Things Fall Apart

by Arlaina Tibensky
July 18th - August 12th

Monday, July 18: Diana at Books by their Story
Wednesday, July 20: Ivy at Ivy Reads
Friday, July 22: Jenny C at Mimosa Stimulus
Monday, July 25: Rummanah at Books in the Spotlight
Tuesday, July 26: Alisia at Alisa Leavitt
Thursday, July 28: Patricia at Patricia's Particularity
Friday, July 29: Kari at A Good Addiction
Monday, August 1: LiLi at Chica Reader
Wednesday, August 3: Cass at C A Marshall
Friday, August 5: Danielle B at Frenzy of Noise
Monday, August 8: Hannah at Paperback Treasures
Tuesday, August 9: Erica at The Book Cellar
Thursday, August 11: Julie at That’s Swell
Friday, August 12: Jen D at What's On the Bookshelf

These feature anything from interviews with me, interviews with Keek, playlist commentary and/or me, basically going on and on and on about writing and my book and Sylvia Plath. I know! You can't get ENOUGH of the self promotion...

Well, I do love the book and I really want it to get in as many hands as possible. Thank you so much for the love and support and for recommending AND THEN THINGS FALL APART to all the coolest teenagers (and adults!) you know...

Reviews are coming soon... Also, some great YA authors and colleagues have interviewed me too and those will be up when Things Get Pulled Together. I will so totally let you know.

xxoo-

-Arlaina

WHAT A BIZARRE AND LOVELY COINCIDENCE!

2011-07-21T11:37:00.008-04:00

So. On the cover of AND THEN THINGS FALL APART there is a typewriter. And not just any typewriter, a Smith Corona Corsair that is also blue and has a dual black and red ribbon.

Would you be surprised if I told you that I already had this EXACT same typewriter in my possession?

I got it home and lugged it to the typewriter hospital, AKA the Gramercy Office Equipment Company on 5th Avenue and 23rd street. I bought a ribbon and they oiled it for me and let me tell you I SWOONED when I found the place.

Here's some great shots of the joint. I shall be bringing this very same typewriter to the LAUNCH so that everyone can behold the magnificence of this machine and have some good clean fun with real type... And when I say everyone, I secretly mean: YOU!

Books of Wonder! Tuesday, July 26, 6pm

2011-07-19T14:55:00.003-04:00

Just a friendly reminder about the LAUNCH PARTY. I keep typing "lunch party" which is something else all together...)

The Above the Bridge Reading was a blast last night. Today we frolicked in the kiddie pool, I got my hair cut, ordered cupcakes and fiddled with Facebook pages.

What I'm trying to say is that I am in the Z O N E and can't wait to see you next Tuesday at

B O O K S of W O N D E R!

xxoo

UPTOWN LOVE! Tonight! 8-10pm Above the Bridge Summer Book Party

2011-07-18T13:49:00.005-04:00

Special Event!

Monday, July 18th @ 8PM

Summer Book Party!

Featuring the Books of

Neighborhood Authors

Including such literary luminaries as

Julia Attaway!
Lola Koundakjian!
Angela Lovell!
Jeanine McAdam!

and...

Arlaina Tibensky!

@ The Red Room Lounge

1 Bennett Ave @181st Street

$5 cover (cash only)

It's one of the best and only reading series in the Heights!

I'll be reading from And Then Things Fall Apart...

...and passing out bookmarks and invitations to the Books of Wonder Launch.

Come on up! A train to 181.

It's always a fun and slightly boozy night... I mean, you know what I mean...

See you tonight?

xoxo

Reading tonight! At WordUp Community Pop-Up Bookstore...

2011-07-06T10:22:00.003-04:00

Come on uptown! There will be amazing literary uptown teens, an open mike, a mini-workshop to stretch your creative brain like chewing gum and me at 5pm, talking about my love of Sylvia Plath as a teen and reading from AND THEN THINGS FALL APART. I will be giving away a book! And bookmarks! And invitations to the Books of Wonder book launch on Tuesday July 26th!

Word Up, at 4157 Broadway near 176th Street, is open from 4 p.m. to 9 p.m.

WEDNESDAY, JULY 6
MIERCOLES, JULIO 6
4-5pm
Open Mike with Teens
Mariecarmen Hernandez,local teen poet will read from her collection of poems. Other teens are welcome to read their poems and prose on this special open mike reading featuring local teen writers.

5-6pm
Arlaina Tibensky, local writer will be reading from her forthcoming young adult novel

And Then Things Fall Apart (Simon & Schuster) – available July 26^thin bookstores.

Q&A to follow reading.

6pm - 7:30pm
Ezra Wolkenfeld will lead an open exercise in creative writing. All ages are welcome to participate in this event.

It's going to be great! So happy to be able to contribute to the store and the community and meet real live teenagers in the Heights!

see you there?

Junior Library Guild Selection for Spring 2011

2011-07-01T09:35:00.003-04:00

Are you sitting down?

This is, word for word, minus some social networking business, a lovely letter I got from The Junior Library Guild.

Please note the words BELLWETHER, LAPEL PIN and SUITABLE FOR FRAMING (and feel, if you will, my delight, pride, and astonishment...)

Dear Arlaina Tibensky,

Congratulations! In keeping with our goal of providing extraordinary reading experiences for children and young adults, And Then Things Fall Apart has been awarded the designation, "A Junior Library Guild Selection" for Spring 2011.

The Junior Library Guild Selection designation is unique in that it is typically awarded so early, often in advance of publication. With its distinction as one of the first awards given, it is often viewed as a bellwether of future success.

It is our pleasure to provide you with the enclosed awards packet: a JLG lapel pin and a certificate suitable for framing.

...

Again, congratulations, and we wish you much success with And then Things Fall Apart.

Best regards,

....

I KNOW!! And believe me, I am sofa king wearing the crap out of that lapel pin!! (I am wearing it now!)

I'm Reading at the WordUp Community Pop-up Bookstore in The Heights!

2011-07-01T09:24:00.012-04:00

"Word Up is a month-long bookshop coming to Northern Manhattan, beginning during the Uptown Arts Stroll/Paseo de las Artes. Sponsored by Vantage Residential and Northern Manhattan Arts Alliance, and coordinated Fractious Press and Seven StoriesInstitute, Word Up will have readings, performances, workshops, talks, and more, with local writers and presses. We hope thatthe idea of a multi-language, general-interest bookstore in the center of the neighbourhood takes hold and that the space—whether this one, or another like it—can continue through and beond the summer.

From June 14 to July 14, shop hours will beweekdays 4-9pm, weekends 12-4pm, with some adjustments for special events. The address is4157 Broadway @ 175 Street."

It is so punkrock DIY with graffitied walls and bilingual books and hipsters and kids and grandmas and Russian Artists leading book making workshops. So up my alley.

On Wednesday, July 6 I'll be reading some stuff from And Then Things Fall Apart as part of their Teen night. 4pm-7:30pm. Mariecarmen Hernandez local teen poet will read from her collection of poems. There's going to be a special open mike reading featuring local teen writers, and an open exercise in creative writing led by Ezra Wolkenfeld.

Me? I'm going to talk about Sylvia Plath, read some of Keek's poems and then a passage that talks about the impact of literature that is also very sexy hot, with Matt and Keek making out AND some Plath references... Should be fun! I might even give a book away! And for sure tons of bookmarks...

Please come!

Tell your fiends.

Tweet at will. It's going to be some anti-establishment good times!

I'm off to buy Sharpies- the kind with a cord so I can wear it around my neck.

Things Fall Apart: Achebe and Tibensky

2011-06-29T09:45:00.003-04:00

When I read Things Fall Apart as a sophomore in college, little did I know that the first African novel I ever read would share most of a title with a book of my own. A book about a white American suburban teenager obsessed with Sylvia Plath, another white suburban teenager.

I mean really.

The title of my book was not my idea. I had the lamest title ever, which means to say nothing useable. When my editor suggested And Then Things Fall Apart (STRONGLY suggested with much excitement and little room for me to say, er no) I brought up Achebe. And that I loved Things Fall Apart, that it is basically African Shakespeare, that it is not a book to toy with or allude to lightly. They smiled (over the phone) and nodded and said brightly "Isn't it just a great title!!!!"

All I could think of was my African Lit professor. He, like Achebe, was Nigerian. He had long fingers with unusually large nails. He brought cola nuts for us to try and took African literature very seriously. He would not be amused.

I also took a Russian Lit class (earth shattering) French Women Writers of Today (badass Irish professor who made use this new thing called "email" to turn in papers) and a whole semester of James Joyce. What if my book were titled The Mister and Margarita? Portrait of the Artist as a Young Teenager? The Giggle of the Medusa?

I read my ass off in college. Any and everything and my brain, when not grunge-rock obsessed and/or caffeinated within an inch of its life, was always ruminating on capital L literature. And loving it.

I just want everyone to know how much I love Achebe's book and how I know that Things Fall Apart, and And Things Fall Apart are only an "and" apart.

AND I ALSO want to say that I love the title and everyone I tell the title to says in a low knowing tone, "ooh, grrreat title!" So there's that. And I'm figuring that most of my book's target audience won't get to Achebe till college so they won't make the connection in the first place. If anything, they will get to MY Things Fall Apart and will think- wait- didn't I already read this? In high school? Keek was Nigerian?

Where's Your Spine?

2011-06-27T09:37:00.009-04:00

My beloved UPS man, Ray (handsome, charming, sly and strong) keeps dropping off boxes for me. These are big boxes full of: books. My books? It is freaking surreal.

The first batch I got was ARCs which were great because I need to give them away and get people to review it, and read it early and what have you. They arrived with postcard notes for me to sign that say (are you ready for the genius of the marketing department of Simon & Schuster? Perhaps you should sit down...)

WHEN LIFE IS SOFA KING HARD... SOMETIMES YOU NEED A GOOD BOOK.

Which is as perfect a tagline for this book as is possible using the English language.

And then four days later I get 25 ACTUAL books. The ones that will be available for sale on July 26 at fine booksellers everywhere. Dear reader... They are beautiful. The typos are gone. The dedication page no longer says TK it says: For my parents... cue emotional tearing up and slow blinking/swallowing.

It's the spine that elevates the book from ARC to BOOK. Turquoise and red. With the cover heart in a circle like a saucy tattoo. I mean really.

I took them all and put them on a shelf, all in a row and it has created a wall of magnificence that I can see out of the corner of my eye as a sit at my desk and

bang out my next... er, book.

One.

Word.

At.

Time.

Thanks evesfangarden for the ARC pic!

What's on My Nightstand

2011-06-17T09:33:00.009-04:00

I love mermaids. When I was a kid I was obsessed with them, would hold my breath underwater and pretend that the light in the Oak Park YMCA pool was a magical mirror into which I would stare through goggle lenses and comb my imaginary mermaid hair. My mother encouraged me to believe in them and I did with all my heart.

Saturday marks the 29th Annual Mermaid Parade at Coney Island and we are not going. I would love it, of course, but with two kids, heat, and the train ride it all adds up to a miserable experience for all.

However... there was a time when I was into it, when I wore shells on my breasts and a tail on my legs and slapped glitter all over my sweaty skin. Coney Island is one of my favorite places on earth. The tattoos! The freaks! The surf! The sand! The Cyclone! Sexy and retro, naughty and nice what is not to love?

Tara Altebrando has written a novel set in this most evocative and magical of places. Dreamland Social Club sounds great, from what I heard at a reading at Books of Wonder. I can't wait to... dive in! And Tara was smart and lovely and did tons of research on the bizarre and perverse history of Coney

Island so. Fasten your seatbelts!

Nova Ren Suma is a great writer who also happens to be a celebrated fellow-alum of Columbia's MFA program. Last month we went for a charming lunch at a secret grotto of a restaurant in the Village and chit chatted about said MFA program and writing and yoga and etc. It was awesome.

Her INSANELY STARRED REVIEWED latest, Imaginary Girls is not about mermaids. It is about sisters and the power of love over death and swimming and all those things give it a supernatural, intense, emotional pull over me that is mermaid-esque.

AND THAT COVER. Unbelievably beautiful- just like the writing inside.

These two books and Swamplandia! and Jon Savage's Teenage are all arm wrestling with a year's worth of New Yorkers on my nightstand... The summer is young! What's on your nightstand?

Oh Book Cover

2011-06-15T14:52:00.000-04:00

How I love thee.

Let me count the ways:

There are no people on it.
There is a blue typewriter on it.
There is COURIER font on it of which I am enamored.
It is about the book. And since the book is about a million things I didn't know how they would ever find an image that would say it all.
I am an ego maniac and I'm delighted that my name is all big and bold and a little obnoxious on the cover.
I ALREADY sign everything with xxx's and oo's so it is so easy to represent my book just by signing emails xxoo- Arlaina
And NOW I can sign the INSIDE XXOO - Arlaina!

Jessica Handelman, Associate Art Director at Simon Pulse is the GENIUS behind this cover.

I never really thanked her and here I am, thanking her now.

XXOO

-Arlaina

BTW I HAVE A BOOK COMING OUT JULY 26

2011-06-03T16:31:00.004-04:00

And I am up to my eyeballs in--er-- the book. I am just putting this out there as a save the date type gesture that the lovely and kind folks at Books of Wonder are hosting a launch party for AND THEN THINGS FALL APART on July 26th from 6-8. There will be beer! Books! Cupcakes! Typewriters! A Sylvia Plath impersonator! And the author herself reading in an entertaining fashion!

Please do come. It's a Tuesday night. July 26th. What the hell else do you really have to do? The launch party will be so fun you will weep tears of delight re-telling the events of that fabled Tuesday to your children and grandchildren.

I can't wait to celebrate with you!

xxoo-

-A

On The Intelligence of Teens- The Smartest Most Alive People on the Planet

2011-04-25T21:54:00.004-04:00

There is this writer I love and have never met named M.T. Anderson. Perhaps you have heard of him? If not, you have now and must run to your nearest bookseller to buy a copy of any of his books. I suggest Feed and/or The Astonishing Life of Octavian Nothing. (His new book, The Game of Sunken Places, is out now and quite good, of course.)

Why do I love him? Because he is a gifted writer who takes writing seriously. Because he writes for young adults. Because his work elevates the genre to its best and highest level. A childless, bespectacled, Samuel Beckett-loving friend of mine told me to read Feed years and years ago and it changed my life and made me consider YA for the very first time.

I was poking around the internet and found his website- which I had never thought of looking for before. There's this whole speech he wrote On the Intelligence of Teens that made me weep with joy.

When I write I try not to think of my audience as being, like, teenagers. I know they are, but if I think about it too much I try to appeal to them a little too much, instead of writing a good book that will interest my kind of reader, at any age. I don't want to dumb down anything on total accident. I am not writing for children, for Christ's sake. I am writing for adults, that are young.

And I trust that teen readers are not dumb and are socially aware and do not live in a techno-centric culture vacuum.

Teenagers? I adore them. They are the smartest, most alive people on the planet.

Alone is Where the Heart Is.

2011-04-25T11:09:00.000-04:00

So there's this thing called "Twitter" that I used to mock the crap out of but now am kind of into- (feel free to follow me @arlainat) and I follow all kinds of random people including two Sylvia Plaths (although she is- er dead).

One "person" I totally follow and which never fails to impress me or shape my day or otherwise cheer me up (I mean let's face it, being a writer is effing depressing) is @quotes4writers.

I love it. I do not, however, have deep or kind feelings for Martin Amis, but he's a smart

fellow at least and I have to give him some credit of some sort, at least for saying this:

"The first thing that distinguishes a writer is that he is most alive when alone."

I read that and it was all lightning bolts and mermaids singing opera and stomach flipping excitement because, yeah. It's so freaking true.

I am, sadly, MOST ALIVE, when alone. Not happiest, most content, cheerful, balanced, stable, etc. MOST ALIVE. Like now for instance, just tippity tapping away on my old blog here, the house is silent, and child-free, a tepid mug of almond milk (don't even- it's something I'm trying) cappuccino at my elbow I am buzzing with aliveness.

Even the exercise I like-- swimming, Bikram (love of my life) Yoga, aerobics at home to a Crunch VHS from 1999- are all, really, for all intents and purposes- solitary activities where, while doing them I feel--- wait for it--- MOST ALIVE.

Having said all this please do not call social services, I still adore people and parties, and companionship and etc. I'm not becoming Howard Hughes.

But I would always rather be alone.

Because it is when I feel MOST ALIVE.

Am I insane?

If the answer is yes, keep it to yourself.

Now, if you'll excuse me...

want

be

a

Lynda Barry: My Hero.

2011-04-22T09:00:00.001-04:00

"The best way to write is to let the image pull you. You should be water-skiing behind it, not dragging it like a barge. Writing should take you for a ride.”

-Lynda Barry

There's this place called the Omega Center in Rhinebeck New York that is a cool collective for "awakening the best in the human spirit." I got this postcard in the mail and read it quick, wondering if they might, perhaps, one day, hire me to teach a class... one day. And I was looking at the writing courses and the teachers and they have great writers- Marge Piercy, poets Billy Collins, Patricia Smith, and Mark Doty and, be still my heart: LYNDA BARRY.

Now, you might not know who Lynda Barry is but you should Google the crap out of her and find out because she will blow your mind. Ernie Pook's Comeek was a regular comic strip in the Chicago Reader and when I was a kid- and I mean, like, 12. I'd get my pre-teen self downtown however I could and come home with fist-fulls of Readers. I loved the Reader. It made me feel independent, like, I could always think whatever I wanted and no one was ever, really, in the ways that mattered, the boss of me.

I especially loved Lynda Barry's Marlys character in all her freaky, quasi abused, depressing, in your face outsiderness and one night, listening to Prince and Joe Jackson on tape over and over and over again, covered my cassette player radio with my year long collection of Ernie Pook's Comeek from the Reader. Do you know how hard it is to cover a radio with newspaper and packing tape? I carefully taped around the speakers, the play, rewind, record and pause buttons.

It was post-modern mid-eighties awesome. Part Pee-Wee's playhouse, part B-52s, and a lot of Cyndi Lauper and Dead Milkmen. These were the Earth Girls Are Easy years and my art piece was part of the zeitgeist, man. And I think I would pay $200 to have that thing back in my house.

Lynda Barry is a great artist. I'm sure she is a great teacher. God how I love her. And I forgot all about her until I saw this class. Lynda, if you are reading this- I love you.

INVINCIBLE SUMMER: FTW

2011-04-19T08:00:00.000-04:00

“Engrossing, messy, complex, and real. Moskowitz's writing is raw and so right." –Lauren Strasnick, author of Nothing Like You

"An intense, bittersweet novel about how people come together and how they break apart, set over four summers. A powerful story that will stay with you." --Jennifer Hubbard, author of The Secret Year

“It’s clear that the author cares deeply about her characters, and she gives their lines density and, frequently, a heavy nostalgic feeling. Teens will welcome the unfiltered dialogue….Chase is a sympathetic protagonist who, like many teens, is on a quest for connection and understanding….Readers will…embrace Moskowitz’s introspective characters and the dramatic situations in which they find themselves.” –SLJ

“The dreamy alternate world of summer vacations provides the backdrop for this soulful look at the growing pains of a single, outwardly normal family....In four sections, each one year apart, Moskowitz delivers a series of scenes--some so brief and spare you'd almost have to call them 'moments'--that communicate Chase's aching awareness of the passage of valuable time....Coming off the edgy Break, this is surprisingly breezy, and you have to commend Moskowitz for her commitment to writing sensitive books with male protagonists." –Booklist

There is a writer I know who has had a huge impact on me during this whole YA escapade.

Her name is Hannah Moskowitz. Perhaps you have heard of her? If I had been pregnant in high school, I am technically old enough to be her mother but I am not her mother- I am her acolyte.

We had the same agent and then we moved to the same agent in a good way, for exactly the same reasons. And we have the same publisher. WHAT ARE THE FREAKING ODDS?

She was crazy emotionally supportive of me and my effed up ego fear writing hangups early on, not by like, addressing them with me over coffee via Skype, but by leading by example.

She is just awesome and deals with that on a daily basis.

And she writes her ass off.

And she is so talented and insightful that I am constantly whipping out my notebook to jot down the bits of wisdom that flutter down from the master.

And her amazing and beautiful book INVINCIBLE SUMMER is out TODAY TODAY TODAY!

Run, don't walk, as the kids say. Available at fine booksellers everywhere.

And thank you Hannah Moskowitz for everything...

ROCK THE DROP!

2011-04-13T23:38:00.004-04:00

I am so rocking the drop tomorrow because it is like paying it forward for geeks and I am so into it it's not even funny.

ROCK THE DROP, FOOLS!

And yes, I know that right now it's midnight and I just figured out that it is tomorrow and not next week, if it's not too late for me it is not too late for you!

Unless you're reading this um, late.

Rock it.

Remind me to tell you that about the Bikram Yoga book I paged through next time. Now THAT is a book that would make me swoon if I found it just lying on a tree stump next to a church or ice cream truck or hell, anywhere...

ROCK THE DROP TO DO LIST

Typewriters, AND THEN THINGS FALL APART, and Me

2011-04-04T21:29:00.013-04:00

Even before I wrote a book that is supposed to have been written on one, I have always been a fan of the typewriter. Long ago I had a small collection that my mother donated to the local Nurse's Association Thrift Store once I moved out. I didn't freak out. I just went and bought more.

It's the sexy little "portable" ones of which I am especially fond. What people once thought of as portable in this age of iphones, and microchips, and GPS and what have you, redeems my faith in humanity. As I'm sure you are aware, when the Rapture comes, eyeglasses with become currency and those with typewriters will be the ones who will repopulate the world.

And so now there's all this chatter about the "hipster"and their "love" of "typewriters." There's stalls of them at the Brooklyn Flea. On Etsy, you can buy necklaces, cufflinks, and elaborate brooches made from typewriter keys and precious decoupaged and silkscreened art pieces with Olivettis and Smith Coronas. This NY Times article is amazing and, for the record, I have never paid more that $20 for a typewriter.

Nothing says I am hyper literate like a typewriter fetish. So yes. I am (re)amassing a fine collection. I have about 4 in storage in New Jersey. I have a recurring and often seemingly urgent fantasy of getting industrial shelving from Ikea and arranging them, MOMA like, above my writing space- where I am sure they would plummet from the wall and bash my brains all over my computer.

Flavorwire had this piece up with capital W Writers and Their Typewriters- kinda like Major League Sluggers and Their Bats, or, Notorious Gangsters and Their Tommy Guns. But it still turned me on. The iconic pic of Sylvia Plath is there and- to my great delight!- Francoise Sagan upon whom I shall lavish more attention later. And that dashing scoundrel angel Langston Hughes. Enjoy!

Flavorwire » Famous Authors And Their Typewriters

My items are up FRIDAY APRIL 1 at 4:00! NO JOKE!

2011-04-01T15:33:00.003-04:00

YEEHA!

Bid Bid Bid~

http://write-hope.blogspot.com/2011/04/day-10-item-8.html

OOK!

(One Of a Kind...)

Great people great and legit cause and I am hoping I am the winner of a hot little pair of hand knit fingerless gloves...

Write Hope!

2011-03-30T10:17:00.003-04:00

Write Hope

On March 11th a 9.0 Mw megathrust earthquake followed by a devastating tsumani shocked Japan. One of the five most powerful earthquakes since 1900, the Sendai earthquake shifted the earth's axis and shortened the length of day.

Three days later, it's still unclear how far the damage reaches. Entire villages have been erased and hundreds of thousands of people are homeless. It is estimated tens of thousands people have been killed.

AP / The Yomiuri Shimbun, Tsuyoshi Matsumoto

We were devastated to hear of this recent disaster, and want to do our bit to help. To that end we have formed Write Hope, a group of Kidlit writers who plan to auction kidlit books, critiques, and other prizes for donation to Save the Children's emergency relief fund.

See? Just when I thought all I could do was cry and freak out, Marieke from Write Hope contacted me and my donated items for auction should be up soon... My items, are of course, the coolest.

Write Hope: About Write Hope

Click click and bid bid bid!

Japan and Japan and Japan

2011-03-15T09:52:00.004-04:00

Trying to stay upbeat about my own little universe here, but all I can think of is ume blossoms, and wet ruined things, broken hearts, smashed bento boxes and love letters obliterated. And to add insult to injury, irradiated. It seems like such a messy, sloppy, indiscriminate obliteration for such a disciplined, respectful, and orderly country.

My stomach is in knots over it. I can't sleep. I keep waiting for Mothra to emerge from the sea and bring it all back to the way it was with a flap of his enormous dusty wings.

Meanwhile, I prepare for the NYC Teen Author Festival with butterflies in my stomach. But all I can think of is the young Japanese writer whose first novel was about to come out in late summer but now won't. And I want to stop thinking about it but I can't. And the images keep coming, and the numbers racking up.

I always wanted to visit Japan.

What Should I Wear, an Update

2011-03-14T13:28:00.008-04:00

These are my two favorite things...

just added! by belljarsummer featuring necklaces

Perhaps I should wear them both to an event or two? See, the thing is, I'm just trying to look as much like "myself" as I can when I meet some of my favorite YA writers... And!

Libba Bray FRACTURED BOTH HER ELBOWS?!!?

Oh No!

in like a lion...

Literary Ladies: Or What to Wear to a Reading When You are the Reader

2011-03-07T14:22:00.013-05:00

I curate and co-host a reading series and you'd think I'd be very comfortable with what to wear to a reading. Last night at Pen Parentis where we hosted poet Mahogany L. Browne, Thelma Adams, and the amazing YA writer Cathleen Bell I rather enjoyed my little outfit, right down to my teal tights and boots.

BUT NOW I have to figure out what to wear to a huge reading at a library with bus loads of teenagers and then what to wear to the DEBUT AUTHOR SHOWCASE... (click NTC Teen Author Festival logo for full schedule).

Why is this keeping me up at night? I know the right answer is just to be myself, but lately, I'm not sure what that means.

I'm still on a Patti Smith vest and tuxedo shirt kick but I also want to have a 1950's retro feel to honor the Sylvia Plath parts of AND THEN THINGS FALL APART. There is a huge vintage clothing element in my book too so I want to represent that part of it all too.

And I want to not only SEEM young but to actually feel very close to how I felt when I was 17. Jeggings might be involved.

And I want the teenagers to think I'm cool.

Good luck...

My new pal Maeve at The Plath Diaries did this whole thing on Polyvore about Plath and fashion which totally inspired me to try it out. And here is an outfit I am considering for the Showcase:

reading outfit? by belljarsummer featuring vintage brooches

And then badass Michelle Tea over at the Ironing Board Collective did this great piece on Looking at Literary Ladies and it reminded me that it kinda matters, how we represent ourselves to the world. I mean, I am, after all A WOMAN OF LETTERS! I want to look the part and live the life and love every minute of it...

I'm getting a new haircut with Steph at Dickson Hairshop on Tuesday so... I'll keep you posted.

GET IT? "Posted." A little blogging humor for you this fine Wednesday.

Till Friday-

PS did you know Poet Nikki Giovanni has "THUG LIFE" tattooed on her forearm? Neither did I!

30th Follower...

2011-03-01T14:42:00.004-05:00

You know who you are, and I know who you are and I have not forsaken thee!

I've been throwing pottery at the worlds

S L O W E S T studio and still haven't gotten my stuff out of the kiln yet.

Oops! Did I ruin the surprise? They are AND THEN THINGS FALL APART related and might be the ugliest things ever made by human hands but you are getting one and so is my agent and so is my, er, mom.

Patience and Forgiveness are not just names of Puritan girls. Thanks so much for being both.

NYC Teen Author Festival 2011!

2011-02-25T20:36:00.008-05:00

David Levithan is a lucid, passionate, smart writer who I love for many reasons, not the least of which is his selfless and tireless work creating a vibrant community of YA writers.

https://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=56488781586&ref=ts

So there is this NYC Teen Author Festival which I am somehow through the good graces of who knows who, involved with. (!) I will be reading from AND THEN THINGS FALL APART on Thursday, March 17 at this fancy library center. It is also known as St. Patrick's day and I have not yet decided if I will wear green...

Then I will miraculously be on a PANEL of debut authors on Friday, March 18 at the 42nd Street Library. But my book isn't out till July. But I will still talk about it. And the whole "debut" thing. With gusto!

The whole event is miraculous. Every sparkling wonder that has ever written for teen readers with any seriousness is going to be there. LIBBA BRAY! DAVID LEVITHAN! HOLLY BLACK! JUDY BLUNDELL! E. LOCKHART! I could go on, but I might have a heart attack...

Here's a few details below for the events I'm slated for but the whole thing is going to be great. I'm going to try to go to as many as I can.

Now.

WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR?

Suggestions accepted.

https://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=56488781586&ref=t

Please click the above facebook link for the official page and up to date info

Thursday, March 17 (Five Borough Read, 10-12):
Bronx Library Center, 310 E Kingsbridge Road, Bronx

Margie Gelbwasser
Sarah Darer Littman
Arlaina Tibensky
Maryrose Wood

Friday March 18th, Symposium (South Court, 42nd Street Library, 2-6)

3:00 – 3:50: Debut Author Showcase

Authors:
Jocelyn Davies
Margie Gelbwasser
Christopher Grant
Anne Heltzel
Kimberly Marcus
Arlaina Tibensky

Moderator: Jack Martin / Chris Shoemaker

I Blame the Bikram Yoga...

2011-02-25T20:01:00.007-05:00

I am obsessed. I would rather tie myself into a pretzel while sweating to death than blog, eat, write, bathe my children, cook, clean, and read.

I love it. I love how gross it is. I love how all my clothes fit me. I love how much less my back hurts. I love how I can finally do that thing with my foot that I couldn't do two months ago. (see picture)

Love. It.

And I'm not even that guilty about it.

L. K. Madigan passed away this week. She was a YA writer and a wise women. She had a brief and horrible fight with pancreatic cancer. This is her advice to writers, aspiring or otherwise:

“The main thing is to WRITE. Some days it might be 2000 words. Some days you might tinker with two sentences until you get them just right. Both days belong in the writing life. Some days you may watch a ‘Doctor Who’ marathon or become immersed a book that is so good you can’t stop reading. Some days you may be in love or in mourning. Those days belong in the writing life, too. Live them without guilt.”

And so up yours guilt. I'm through with you.

The Lamest of the Lame

2010-12-15T14:14:00.002-05:00

Alas, I've been too busy to do many of the things I love and that includes blogging.

This is to say that I am on a break, a hiatus, a holiday, taking a breather, rolling over and pressing the snooze button for the 8th time.

Thanks for being so kind and patient and cool and all the things you know you are.

I love you.

I'm back in January.

And we'll take up where we left off, darling.

xxoo

Your pal,

Arlaina

Got Milk?

2010-11-17T12:45:00.007-05:00

First, I am alive. I have been swamped with edits, children, house guests and life, I guess. I love blogs, I love blogging and forgive me for ignoring my responsibilities. Here's an update

I totally bailed on NANOWRIMO. My kid's birthday was in there and I had to take a bus with a baby and a stroller to Target to buy crap for the party because I couldn't do it any other day and then I was a whole 2 days behind and was never gonna catch up no matter how many pep talk emails they sent to my inbox. I am not discouraged. It made me think about my next project and now I'm all committed.
I've been listening to a lot of Terry Gross interviews while I work and I love it.
I have not done laundry in too long. We are finally out of sheets, towels and underwear.
I have lots of fun little Sylvia Plath things going on and I'll tell you more about it when I have time and when they happen.

And now I must share THIS with you because it is precisely these kinds of things that make me fall in love with people and the internet all over again. Thanks to Paisley Pajamas for the heads up... just clickety click on the HERE for funtimes.

I'm Running Away to Join the Circus.

2010-11-04T12:58:00.005-04:00

Have you heard about this? There's this PBS Documentary about the Big Apple Circus like a behind the scenes Real Housewives of New Jersey but real and cool and it is amazing. It's called, THE CIRCUS, a six part series that started yesterday and airs on Wednesdays at 9pm EST. I am already addicted and can't wait for more. I also just found out that a parent I know's partner is the editor and THIS is why I love NYC. There is also this woman who lived near me who actually did pack it all in and joined the freaking circus. I think she was into hooping or horses- I can't quite remember but the point is, she did it. She packed up her hobo kerchief, slung it on a pole, and hopped a freight train dreaming of the glamour of the flying trapeze, trained tigers and sequined fishnets. I have a relative who did something similar with drag queens and dancing poodles but that, my friends, is a story for another day.

BONSAI!!!!

2010-10-27T10:37:00.005-04:00

I am doing it. I am going to write a novel in 30 days. Hannah Moskowitz made me do it. And my life made me do it, too. I have three ideas for another book and I'm the kind of writer that needs to be threatened, whipped, cajoled, shamed, dared, challenged, tricked, peer pressured etc. into producing words. I think I would be more productive if I would stop self editing at every opportunity and use the bonsai approach- just vomit out 50,000 words and then prune, trim, hack away until I like the deformed little tree that remains.

I have mocked the NaNoWriMo in the past as a gimmicky exercise in futility but have seen the light. I need to get started. I'm going to just write my guts out: EVERY DAY. For one month straight. Wish me luck. I'll keep you posted. I think I'm going to try and expand my favorite and most successful short story "Buying the Farm" into a novel ala the great Meg Mullins.

I'm getting my literacy charity links together and they are good ones. If you have any suggestions, let me know!

Geek Alert

2010-10-22T12:44:00.005-04:00

There is this company called Outofprintclothing that sells t-shirts with vintage book covers on them. For each shirt they sell, one book is donated to a community in need through their partner Books For Africa.

I wanted to buy, oh, all of them but I ended up getting To Kill a Mockingbird, Catcher in the Rye, and The Master and Margarita. Three of my all time favorites and what better to wear to a promotional event for AND THEN THINGS FALL APART than a Young Adult classic under a cozy boyfriend sweater?

And this way I can write them off for tax purposes. Because I can't believe I spent almost $100 on t-shirts. But they have sexy lady tees too so check them out.

At the end of your purchase, they flash an image of these happy African children in school uniforms reading books. And all guilt was miraculously gone.

SHOP SHOP SHOP! they have all kinds of badassery for sale...

I should think about linking some donation buttons to literacy charities. I don't know about you, but this blogging seems pretty narcissistic. To me anyway. Next post will be all about my headshots.

Oh I DO crack myself up!

I Am Alive...

2010-10-20T15:03:00.004-04:00

Just been a little crazy. My most favorite thing I've done since we last spoke was obey my horoscope entirely (thank you Susan Miller at Astrologyzone.com). She said that I would get an opportunity to volunteer for something and I should just say yes and not question it. And so when my neighborhood Harvest Festival put a call out for facepainters I did as instructed and said "Yes!"

Now, I have never facepainted before but I'm an artist and a master of disguise and I love kids who love to get painted and dear reader, it was: AMAZING.

I brought my own brushes and used the lead painter, Donetta's, paints. I began at 1:30 and stopped at 5:00. I painted about one kid every 2-5 minutes so that's about 2,000 children.

I was sore. I was tired. But I was inspired and so into it! The kids were great and fearless. I did fairy princesses, harlequin masks on two cool 6th graders, pirates, Spidermen, dogs and cats and leopards. My favorites were the scary ones. One girl wanted to be a Vampire Princess. Two older boys didn't know what they wanted to be but I made them Day of the Dead skulls and they loved it. I did a Rainbow Tiger with a large glittering jewel on her forehead. I made an 18 month old a stubbled and scarred wayfarer on the high seas.

It was like the universe gave me a big kiss and a glass of wine.

Awe.

Some.

I also started throwing pottery again and oh mysterious 30th follower- when the stuff emerges from the kiln, I'll send it out!

This is what I do whilst taking a month long vacation from writing...

Reading and Writing

2010-08-31T09:46:00.006-04:00

If you don't have time to read, you don't have the time or the tools to write.
--Stephen King

Thank you twitter. And thank you @adviceforwriters.

So right (write!).

I am editing. And planning a birthday party. Doing laundry. Washing the kitchen floor. Making lamb chops for dinner when my dad came to visit. Whipping up gobs of Flubber with borax and glue. Writing. But reading?

No effin way.

A woman of magnificence I know recommended a book to read called Lonely Werewolf Girl about a skinny, Scottish, runaway, werewolf princess named Kalix. I am loving it. It is so not what I usually read but I am making time in my ridiculous schedule to read it.

I abandoned Marie Antoinette. I have foresworn mindless television watching save for Sunday marathons of HBO and Madmen and the occasional netflixed pic on Thursday and Saturday nights.

This is what it takes, people. I have a stack on my nightstand of books to be read and here is a list:

A Visit from the Goon Squad

The Artist's Wife

Will Grayson, Will Grayson

Marlene Dietrich, a biography

If I Loved You, I Would Tell you This

The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake

Bonjour Tristesse

I better get crack a lakin'

And 30th follower and winner of mysterious prize? I have not forgotten about you!

Yes, there is a winner. No, I don't know what the prize is...

2010-08-31T08:53:00.004-04:00

We have a winner for the 30th follower! She seems grand and when I decide what it is she has won... I shall send it and then make it public here.

I'm editing like mad and am preoccupied with the work at hand. It's like work, this editing. The writing writing is like playing. It's like playing badminton on hallucinogens with ovulating angels.

Editing is like work. Temping on Wall Street type work and I don't like it. What's so demoralizing about it is that your editor, if she's any good-- and mine is very very good-- finds your weakest spots as a writer and irons them out dele mark by dele mark.

You thought that no one would notice that weird thing about the grandma and just keep reading. Wrong. You thought your quirky use of punctuation and the word "and" was groundbreaking? Nope. You thought that your MFA from Columbia University gave you a complete understanding of correct comma placement and how to conjugate lay, lie, lain. Ha. Were you deluded!

That's were this is at. And ending a sentence with a preposition is bad English. It just happens to be how people from Chicago talk. Unfortunately.

30th FOLLOWER GETS A PRIZE!

2010-08-25T15:55:00.003-04:00

I'm trying to rack up my numbers here, people.

No, I do not know what the prize will be.

It will be a good one- maybe a book? Food? A decade of the rosary said on your behalf one Wednesday morning mass?

Become the 30th follower... And find out!

THIS IS GOING TO BE SO FUN!

Sylvia Plath Inc.

2010-08-23T12:19:00.011-04:00

There was a time, long ago, when I was obsessed with tattoos. I was so into them, I subscribed to Tattoo magazine and felt that permanent ink was the only way to identify myself as an individual. Or something.

So I have one, and I love it but that is only because I can't see it. It's on my lower back and as good as invisible to me. Sometimes, I'll pass tattooed people and sigh like my mother, "Oh, why would they do that to themselves," before remembering that I, er, HAVE ONE. And kind of a big one at that.

Getting it was one of the best days of my life. Right up there with getting married and having babies. That night, I had my first martini (with a slice of Polish sausage in it instead of an olive). I was high on adrenaline all night and went and saw a band called the Cocktails, flashing my tattoo/ass to anyone who wanted to mess with me. Like those other milestone days, it was momentous. It was painful. It would be remembered forever.

So there is this whole literary tattoo trend underfoot and I'm intrigued. I wanted to showcase a few Sylvia Plath tattoos because they are relevant and something I think, that my main character Keek, might go off and do one day.

Most of these are of the I am I am I am variety and

this one is rather nice and MFA subtle...

These are a little Angelina Jolie (in a good way).

This one is an ode to "Tulips" and it is huge and dark and

Sylvia had no idea this is where here words would end up!

This one is cool too. It has all got me considering another one,

tattoo that is. Not baby. Or even book... Well, maybe book.

I'm thinking I want to write the kind of books that inspire people to tattoo themselves. This is the answer I will give the next time some interviewer asks me, "Why YA?"

My Other Car is a Bicycle

2010-08-22T19:13:00.005-04:00

That is a bumper sticker I never quite understood. Another bumper sticker I never particularly enjoyed was of the "I'd Rather be Fishing/Hunting/Sailing" variety and yet, since getting my long awaited edits, believe me: I get it.

This editing is way harder than I thought.

I would rather be:

At Ikea
Cleaning out the hall closet
Doing effing laundry
Reading my Marie Antoinette book (Almost done! How will it end?)
Playing around with lipstick and eye shadow so my lips look like the above

Anything anything ANYTHING other than making artistic choices strongly encouraged by my editor...

No news on the title either.

What's in a Name?

2010-08-20T09:38:00.007-04:00

I'm having some title trouble and I don't really want to go into it except to say there is this new book out, by fellow MFA holder Lish McBride, with the best title ever.

Are you sitting down?

It is called HOLD ME CLOSER, NECROMANCER and I am so green with raging envy at the amazingness of it that it only makes my own title search all the more difficult because, well, it is hard to see through the green haze.

The cover's Lou Reed cool too.

And it's on my to-read list and I hear, from smart people, that it is a great novel too.

As for this title business let me be clear. This is an issue for me in all areas of my life, putting a clear label on a thing. If you do a little digging, you will see that my short story title prowess is also rather lacking (although I rather liked "Cannibals"). I had trouble calling my husband "my Husband" till about a year ago and don't get me started on how we named the kids. The words I would use are... slowly, passionately, randomly. Which describes the way I do most things in my life.

My soon to be named novel is about a lot of complex things and I don't want to scare people by some freak show title. But then I want it to be a name for my book- not just any book out there. I want it to be:

catchy
enigmatic
specific
funny
weighty
start with the letter A
wink to Sylvia Plath
avoid being too Plathian

How hard could it effin be?

Stay tuned...

Oh, Johnny.

2010-08-12T12:33:00.002-04:00

My one time writing teacher, mentor, and fellow-midwesterner Jonathan Franzen is on the cover of effing Time Magazine.

TIME MAGAZINE.

Long ago he was in there for a little "writers to watch" thing so they have been onto him for years. Now he is the most famous Great American Novelist ever and he seems so far far far away from me when I once thought we were the same people in different bodies.

Well. Maybe he'll blurb BELL JAR SUMMER for me... The teens are way into the Franz.

Ponderosa Stomp!

2010-08-02T12:33:00.013-04:00

Hey cats. Summer weekends when I am not writing on deadline, shopping at Trader Joe's or lying on a couch drinking gins and tonics and watching the Wonder Pets with my children I do other things. Like Rock the eff out. OK well here's what we did this weekend.

We woke up and ate frozen waffles, watched Nick Jr. till we were seasick, took out the garbage, and left the house at noon.
We dragged our beautiful gadabout children to the zoo. We became members and got a t-shirt! Saw the elusive snow leopard. Ate a pre-packed picnic lunch and drank iced coffee.
Went to the Victorian Gardens at Central park where we spent thousands of dollars. We went on the froggy ride, airplane ride twice, and played whack-a-mole and a clown mouth water shooting game. We won nothing but had a freaking ball.
Dragged kids to free outdoor Lincoln center show celebrating Detroit's hot music with Death, The Gories, Question Mark and the Mysterians, and Mitch Ryder and the Detroit Wheels!!

Death was amazing and the drummer was tight.

The Gories, my new favorite, sang a song called "You Think You're Something but You're Nothing to Me." Which might be the title of the next one.

The kids loved it! We loved it. We looked cool and made out a lot and drank beer. Outside. With The Gories on stage and the kids in the double stroller! OK, we couldn't stay for Mitch Ryder but we ALMOST did.

AND THEN we went to Whole Foods and picked up sushi and went home. Fed the kids cold pasta and milk at 10:30. Got them to sleep by 11:15. We passed out with them and woke up at midnight and ate the sushi and drank sake and watched Michael Clayton. The movie.

I am not trying to brag about our amazing weekend but it was the first time in a long time we felt like the cool hip parents we are. We ALL had fun and the weather was perfect and it was right up there with a big date I had with my then boyfriend, now husband where we went to Coney Island all day, went back to my place to change and then got all gussied up for a swing show at Don Hills. Yes. It was a LONG time ago.

Rrrrreal Rock and Roll bebeh!

Contests

2010-07-26T14:16:00.004-04:00

Am I supposed to be giving things away here? Ok. Perhaps I shall start. But not today. I know a lot of bloggers are just giving away the store, every day, just win this, and first five commenters that, and one lucky commenter will... and actually I LOVE it.

That reminds me. I have a bar of Green & Black's organic dark chocolate here with a Simon Pulse paper label around it that says "Welcome to Simon Pulse! We're excited to have you- and excited to meet you on Friday!" and it is signed by Anica and Annette, my gifted editors who, in my head only, I refer to as Annettica. Should I give this away to a lucky winner?

I got that in March. I have been saving it, for what? I do not know, nor can I bring myself to eat it. This is how hoarding begins. It is probably stale and gray on the edges by now.

I'm thinking of a contest and with only 25 loyal and intelligent followers, your odds are really good here, folks.

I'm busy getting ready for our splashy Pen Parentis Author Salon on September 14- Jen Eagan and Darin Strauss and... Abby Sher! Rock and freaking roll!

Oh and I'm afraid I am in a weird kind of love with James Franco. Allen Ginsberg. James Dean. Who's next in his repetoire, Abraham Lincoln?

Can these posts be any LESS coherent? Yes. Yes they could.

My Agent

2010-07-24T10:09:00.002-04:00

Hardest working agent in the book biz. So glad she is mine!

xxoo, Suzie

Queer Divine Dissatisfaction

2010-07-23T12:04:00.007-04:00

I just hit send.

Meaning, I just sent my heavily revised MS to my editor/s. Meaning I am now on vacation for 2 weeks. Meaning I am shitting myself. Meaning I will now take a little nap, awake, and then put together a toy chest from IKEA. Meaning I am very sad that this part of the process is over.

Have I ever been happier? Not really. I loved writing on a deadline. I loved being with Keek every day. I loved that people were waiting for IT, what I was WRITING, with baited breath. I know there's still a ways to go. They might hate it. They might want 400 more pages by next weekend. They might take out my favorite parts. There is work to be done! But still. This part is over and I'm sad and exhausted and am reminded of this:

"There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. ... No artist is pleased. [There is] no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others"

--Martha Graham

Truth Has a Name and it is Peter K Steinberg

2010-07-21T20:59:00.005-04:00

So I'm working on this book about a girl who is obsessed with Sylvia Plath and The Bell Jar- have I mentioned this?- and I've become an admirer and pal of Plath scholar and champion Peter K Steinberg and his great blog Sylvia Plath Info.

Remember your junior year of high school when you had that English teacher who was tough as nails and would give you an F if your A paper wasn't stapled correctly?

The one who made you pay ATTENTION to commas?

The one who made you make clear and precise arguments to defend your views on great literature?

The one who you loved to mock because she wore bobby pins in the back of her head to keep a cowlick down and you'd sit there in class furious that you wanted to impress her so bad with your amazing English Language Skills?

For me that teacher was Mrs. Cain and it is a great thrill to discover that Mr. Steinberg is of the Cain school of citing and attribution. In a world where media is transient as summer tan lines and twitter is re-wiring our brains and kids in the UK don't get married anymore I am tickled pink that there are a rare and honorable few who know how important words are. And he mentioned my little project here, so. There's that too. XXOO Peter! Keep fighting the good fight! And thank you for paying close attention.

I Should Be... Tweeting?

2010-07-07T09:15:00.005-04:00

Writing

Not whatever the hell I think I am doing that is so much more important than writing.

Oh yeah, and I'm tweeting now. Reluctantly. Come! Follow me! Because I am so effin facinating you just can't get enough.

ugh.

@ArlainaT if you are interested.

DEADLINE LOOMS... the art is by Maissa Toulet. She is French. These are from 2008 and I love them.

Sylvia Plath is Lavishly Apt

2010-06-29T14:57:00.002-04:00

Anagrams are my new favorite thing.

And so is this:

And I am nearing the finish line with the pages here.

And loving it!

And hating it!

Equally!

Talk more soon...

xxoo

Great Literature Blows My Mind

2010-06-25T08:58:00.010-04:00

This is a new gem from my pal Peter K. Steinberg at Sylviaplathinfo.blogspot.com. He's videotaping the actual public garden Plath writes about in Chapter 11. My favorite part is the end where Peter says he thinks that's what a weeping scholar tree is. It's beautiful and surreal, to see in real life what you have imagined in your own reader's brain a thousand times as you revise your YA book called Bell Jar Summer. In Chapter 11 she also mentions Chicago and imagines the intricacies involved in committing Hari Kari, "...they would jab in the knives in and zip them around, one on the upper crescent and one on the lower crescent, making a full circle. Then their stomach skin would come loose, like a plate, and their insides would fall out, and they would die."

I know!

This whole video reminded me of the time I was in Russia in 1994 post Perestroika and Galsnost, pre now. I was a Russian Lit freak (are you surprised?) and in love with Bulgakov's The Master and Margarita and we visited Patriarch's Ponds in Moscow where the beginning of the novel is set and it was like walking fully awake through a recurring dream. On a corner of the deserted water there was a cafe with a giant menacing black cat painted on the wall (Behemoth) and we spent what little money we had left to eat real food there. The place was filled with drunk Russian gangsters and a skinny and terrified strolling violin player. There were roses on the tables and menacing hilarity throughout. If only I had a digital camera then.

To All My Friends!

2010-06-03T09:02:00.007-04:00

Things are purring along here in Bell Jar Summer Land. The words aren't exactly leaping out of my brain onto the page but, they are slowly but surely showing up for work. Bukowski, as played by Mickey Rourke in Barfly, said no writer worth anything wrote in peace. And thank christ because things are upside down and inside out and etc. all around me. Summer camp registration, laundry, dinner, can you pick up my kilt from the dry cleaner, blackberry washing, packing, car seat ordering, bed making, picture hanging, oh and my Mom's on her way to Paris, my baby needs a haircut and I can't tell if the dishes in the dishwasher are clean or dirty. We're off to Scotland in one week. I need 50 more pages of great genius. And YET!! I love it all! When I remember to eat is is standing over the sink and involves hummus, hot sauce, and some kind of whole wheat mini bagel or whole wheat tortilla. It's all good but. It's a lot. When I imagined my eventual rise to literary infamy it involved lengthy in-depth interviews on NPR, smoking while wearing cashmere and long un-interupted days immersed in language and nuance and insights to the human condition. Ah well. I'm doing it aren't I. Aren't I?

Recycling Tarantulas and Sex Tapes

2010-05-29T13:01:00.019-04:00

I'm thinking about tarantulas and how they freak my shit. I wrote a short story long ago about a 29 year old who found herself at a teenager party. She ended up petting a tarantula and putting her nipples into the mouth of a 17 year old boy. The story was obviously the young adult writer within my soul clawing to get out. Fast forward to now and I think I have found a way to use a tarantula to even better effect in this revision of my YA novel. I'm also thinking a lot about virginity and the power of young women's sexuality. There is this sex tape out of Kendra, Hugh Hefner's former Girl Next Door. Apparently, she is barely 18 in it, asks many times to not be recorded, and is yet able to be a total come hither sex-pot when not protesting the whole situation. Which sounds entirely age-appropriate to me. And then I read this on The Evil Beet:

Why the Kendra Wilkinson Sex Tape Should Make You Angry

[Kendra's sex tape exploits] that space where young women have discovered and perfected their sexuality and its value, but haven't yet figured out how it's empowering. They just know that it's something people want from them; it's something people expect from them. Something young men expect from them; something, perhaps, that young men haven't learned how to ask for politely. It's uncomfortable and new and everybody's learning, and what happens, more often than not, is that the male partner's desires come first and more forcefully, and the young woman is disrespected and disempowered and left with a sense that she's less valuable and less capable of demanding respect and control than her male counterpart - a sense than lingers into her twenties and beyond, even though she might not recognize it as such.

And I remember being a teenager and a smartass, I remember being hopped up on hormones and Mickey's bigmouths, vulnerable and so young I was convinced I knew exactly what I was doing at every naked moment. I remember it all so well that I'm thinking that I have a lot more work to do and a lot more deep thinking to do on this revision before I hand it in to my editor...

One Story Literary Debutante Ball, May 21 2010

2010-05-26T08:41:00.014-04:00

Here are some candid photos in no particular order from the most amazing night in Literary History! I bring you: The One-Story Literary Debutante Ball... Before I continue let me just say that I have never had such fun with writers. Graduate school was often a cauldron of ambition and jealousy. Oh we were friends and good ones, but underneath the camaraderie was a constant undercurrent of competition that kept your teeth on edge. That unpleasant buzz was gone from this event. Everyone looked beautiful. Everyone was happy. My good friend from grad school who is a successful writer has always said there was plenty of room for everyone who writes, and at the One-Story Ball for the first time in my entire writing life, I believed her.

This first one is my favorite. It's my mentor, pal, and escort of amazing-ness, Victor LaValle and me soaking up the applause of Mr. Jonathan Lethem. That little feather thing in the bottom right corner is my Pen Parentis partner MM De Voe's cocktail ring.

This lovely lady is none other than Ms. Elissa Schappel who looked resplendent in her red hair and retro garb. I was talking to her for about 15 minutes before I realized who she was, and forgot to tell her how much I admire her work... See, that was the whole thing about the event. Writers are not Brangelina. You don't know who is who unless you know them. Which I love. But which is also a little intimidating because one minute you are sipping Brooklyn Lager with a nice lady at the empanada station and next thing you know you have revealed all your breast feeding tips to an Academy Award-winnning screenwriter, aka Tamara Jenkins.

This is Alexis McGuinness. She played a moth in "Bar Joke, Arizona," Sam Allingham's story. I did not know this and thought she wore wings for the hell of it, which I thought was rad.

Revelers- all Pulitzer Prize nominees/winners

Vic. Tor.

He looked amazing and was so charming and great. I think the reason I had such a great time is because such a talented and take no prisoners artist had my back. A thousand thank yous, Mr. LaValle. I owe you a rotisserie chicken.

These two lovebirds are the literary power duo JT Petty and Sarah Langan. Don't they look great?

Yo DJ! My feet were killing me and so not much dancing. I love to dance. I just could not.

One-Story Editor Hannah Tinti and Webonair Devin Emke pose for snaps. Note Colson Whitehead in suit and tie.

This sparkly wonder is Ramona Ausubel who moments before the ball sold a story collection and novel. I know! She is tall and gorgeous and charming too. I hear she can write you under the table too so look out litterati- she's coming to get you and take all your prize monies.

This is Cheston Knapp and Sam Allingham. Two nicer gents I have never met. Writers are so funny. Self-depricating, ambitious, sensitive, envious, emotionally intelligent, bad with money. We are all walking conundrums. We spend our days washing dishes in restaurants to pay the rent and our nights typing on our laptops, pasty and wired on espresso till sun-up, so dressing us up and making us twirl for an audience was quite bewildering for us all- the boys especially. Except for Patrick Somerville- he loves to twirl.

One-Story gave these fake tattoos out a long time ago. This reveler knew to save hers for a special occasion... cool right?

I could have used a better bra, lost 20 pounds and gotten a good night's sleep but this is me at the Ball. I had a singular experience never to be forgotten and can't thank One-Story, Maribeth and Hannah, Master of Ceremonies John Hodgman, Mr. Victor LaValle, my Facinator-maker Heather in London, or my Darling Husband enough... It was a night to remember. You can always subscribe to One-Story or donate $$ to them and write it all off at any time...

I want now to mention all the Debutantes because they are all awesome and I loved spending time with them. We all had a lot in common and were all really different. I shall mention their escorts because they were great too...

Sam Allingham escorted by Dan Chaon

Ramona Ausubel escorted by Michelle Latiolais and Ron Carlson

Nell Casey escorted by Tamara Jenkins

Amelia Kahaney escorted by Michael Cunningham

Cheston Knapp escorted by Jim & Karen Shepard

Grant Monroe escorted by Jonathan Lethem

Patrick Somerville escorted by Hannah Tinti

Cote Smith escorted by Deb Olin Unferth

Here's a great Rumpus piece on the event.

And here's a Poets & Writers Link with VIDEO

And here's an Observer piece too.

Intrigued?

2010-05-19T10:04:00.001-04:00

Literary Debutante Ball fashion advice from One Story’s Associate (Fashion) Editor:

2010-05-18T09:18:00.002-04:00

I have copied and pasted this from One-Story's blog because it is hilarious, inspiring, and I am too busy dying my hair and writing to come up with my own blog material today...

Literary Debutante Ball fashion advice from One Story’s Associate (Fashion) Editor:

An image from Amy Vanderbilt's "How to be well dressed."

I’ve been asked to act as fashion godmother for anyone wondering what to wear to this Friday night’sLiterary Debutante Ball. I must assume this is because I own the complete set of Amy Vanderbilt’s “Success Program for Women,” and quote from its more illuminative tomes such as “Your European Vacation” and “How to Develop Poise and Self-Confidence” regularly.

Happily, there is no dress code for our literary ball. A straw poll reveals our staff is thinking cocktail dresses, sundresses and rompers for the ladies, blazers and ties over jeans, skinny jeans, khakis, or pants my grandmother would refer to as “slacks” for the gentlemen. The American Can Factory in Brooklyn is a fun and creative place, so you could arrive dressed as a slice of Swiss cheese and feel right at home. Unless someone else shows up dressed as one (heaven forbid).

Vintage prom dresses and tuxes, casual Friday office attire: all good! Be comfortable. Be brave. Do your best.

Even more happily, it doesn’t matter what you wear. What matters is whether you have a good heart and how many times you compliment the Associate Editor on her Swiss cheese costume.

Finally, I offer a few nuggets of fashion advice I’ve collected over the years:

“Glamour, always.” – Dita Von Teese

“Before you go out, take one piece of jewelry off.” – my grandmother

“Before I go out, I put one more piece of jewelry on.” – Kim Kardashian

“It’s always better to be overdressed than underdressed.” - Coco Chanel

“My mother taught us that it was always better to be underdressed than overdressed.” Audrey Hepburn’s son, Luca.

“It’s not the clothes, it’s how you wear them.” – Me, 1987

“You cannot go to school with Swatch watches in your hair.” – my mother, 1987

“We’re calling because your daughter came to school with Swatch watches in her hair and refuses to take them out. To make matters worse, after seeing her, several other girls have put their own Swatch watches in their hair. We can’t have that.” – my principal, 1987

“Don’t forget yourself—make sure of yourself!” Amy Vanderbilt’s Success Program for Women, How to Develop Poise and Self-Confidence.

“Nothing beats a nice pair of slacks.” – my grandmother

To Tantalize You...

2010-05-13T14:59:00.004-04:00

I have upped my Do the Write Thing for Nashville DAY 8, ITEM 11 auction to include not only a SIGNED copy of BIRD BY BIRD by Anne Lamott and a short story critique by me but also a copy of the SPRING 2009 issue of INKWELL MAGAZINE where my disturbing and hilarious tale of placenta freezing resides in all its glory and a copy of THE FIRST 5 PAGES: A WRITER'S GUIDE TO STAYING OUT OF THE REJECTION PILE. This is basically, 2 years of Columbia's MFA program distilled into a totally portable moonshine of inspiration and guidance...

Bid! Bid! Bid!

NASHVILLE! Day 8 Item 11!

2010-05-13T11:32:00.007-04:00

My pals at Do the Write Thing for Nashville single handedly pulled together an online auction of writerly things to make some $$ for flood ravaged Nashville. Now, I have never been to Nashville, or even seen the movie but I love country western music, I love people, and hate to see pretty buildings and nice people under water. Please bid on my little contribution of a SIGNED copy of Bird by Bird by the one and only Anne Lamott and a short story critique by one card carrying Columbia MFA grad and One-Story Debutant er, me. All proceeds are tax deductible and go to flood victims. I'd love to get $100... bid early and often~! You can also donate directly and/or bid on other great items!

CLICK HERE to become the person of generosity and integrity you've always wanted to be.

Sylvia's Library

2010-05-12T09:42:00.011-04:00

Who the hell takes a VIDEO of a bookshelf? Peter K. Steinberg at sylviaplathinfo, that's who.

His blog is awesome, smart, and well researched. It always surprises me with a new facet of Ms. Plath- some new insight to her non-suicidal self that never fails to inspire me during this May of Mayhem revision!

I love that he geeked out and went to the Mortimer Rare Book Room at Smith College and took an action-packed VIDEO of Sylvia's personal library shelves. I felt compelled to share it here. Parts 1 AND 2. ENJOY! Fun to play simultaneously...

Books/writers I could make out were: Blake, History of the Bible, German Dictionary, Dostoyevsky's Diary of a Writer, Henry James, The Golden Bough, Freud, The Poems of Robert Frost, Botany Books, Hawthorne short stores, Dubliners, Finnegan's Wake, Kafka, Goethe poems, The Writer's Handbook, Chaucer... D.H. Lawrence, Death in Venice, Christopher Marlowe, Oxford Book of Sixteenth Sentury Writers, Rimbaud, Anne Sexton (!), Baby and Child Care (!), Collected Poems of Wallace Stevens, Plato, Shakespeare, The Painted Caravan, Yeats, Richard Wilbur. If you can see anymore without going blind, let me know! And THANKS, Peter K. Steinberg at Sylvia Plath Info for all the hard work!

A Collection of Brand New Sentences!

2010-05-11T13:14:00.002-04:00

...So if eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich means one less horrifically slaughtered dumb and long-lashed cow, why not? Is meat really so delicious? Well. Sometimes it is. Sometimes, I am obligated to make an exception.

May of Mayhem is going Freaking Fast!

2010-05-06T08:31:00.003-04:00

Yes, I'm doing it but it's taking me a while to get in the zone. And my frenemy the Internet, is being really passive/aggressive. Yes, it's a great research and networking tool, yes I'm getting important emails regarding my literary career, no I don't need to look up "Dubstep" on YouTube because a member of Arlainas Rule the World on Facebook told me to.

Ugh.

Meditating helps. I took this Media Bistro course eons ago about how to make time for writing and basically, the secret is meditating. Sitting down for 5-10 minutes with some kind of guided meditation to focus your creative brain was the instructor's big suggestion. And it so works.

Google "guided meditations" and you'll get a slew of mp3's for your ipod.

And I'm starting to FREAK THE FUCK out about my outfit for the One Story Debutante Ball on May 21st... I'm committed to the lurid and over the top fascinator now that the payment went through.

Dear Reader, do I have the balls to carry it off!?

Stay. Tuned.

CAN'T

2010-05-03T09:15:00.004-04:00

TALK.

MUST.

WRITE.

Well, not really write, write. Read read read is more like it. And get permissions set up and laid out for my agent.

Meanwhile, I'm in convo with a British Etsy seller about a fascinator for the One-Story Debutant ball...

Libba, Stephen, and Harper Lee

2010-04-29T11:45:00.023-04:00

Last night I left the children in the care of someone trustworthy to attend the 50th Anniversary Celebration of To Kill a Mockingbird at Symphony Space. In addition to Oskar Eustis (Artistic Director at The Public Theater), Kurt Andersen (novelist and Studio 360 Host), Jayne Anne Phillips (novelist and National Book Award finalist Lark & Termite), filmmaker Mary McDonagh Murphy (author of the upcoming book Scout, Atticus, and Boo), were two of my favorite people in the world Stephen Colbert and Libba Bray (award winning young-adult novelist Going Bovine, winner of 2010 Printz Award)! Basically, they read excerpts from the book and went on about how great it was. And the audience concurred! The panel was mostly Southern-raised and had a deep connection with the book. I didn't read it till I was out of grad school and at my Scottish husband's insistence (!) but it nevertheless tore my guts out. Scout’s voice is amazing, and I think what every writer, YA or otherwise, aspires to achieve in their work. Just when I thought I could not possibly love him anymore than I already do, Stephen Colbert says that he reads To Kill a Mockingbird at least once a year and his copy is held together with rubber bands. It was a great night with a bizarre panel. Jayne Anne Phillips was a little "I'm a National Book Award Finalist and Who the Hell Are You" the whole night, Libba was a little shy, and it did drag on a bit but Stephen kept it lively and it was a real pleasure to be in a room where people were talking about falling in love with a book. Then we went for tapas and wine (sadly without Libba and Stephen) and caught a taxi home. I was shaken up because all I could think of was Scout and Atticus and Jem and my own two little ones at home and the YA book I'm about to delve into come Monday and the power of words arranged artfully on a page to change the world while drinking a fantastic tempranillo and eating patatas bravas... Not quite a Literary Night of Debauchery but pretty fucking close.

Days to May of Mayhem: 4

So, I'll begin a little Q & A here ala Isaiah Sheffer: What do you remember most from reading the book? Where were you when you first read it and how old?

Your turn! Er, in the comments!

The Bunker is Ready for the YApocalypse

2010-04-27T20:54:00.018-04:00

How to prepare for the MAY OF MAYHEM

Talk to an inspiring writer and friend for 58 minutes and talk about writing, art, and deadlines
Download Microsoft Word onto your newly refurbished laptop and transfer your files
Become Facebook friends with writers you admire
Email your agent about how great the edits are going in vague terms
After looking up how to install Jibbitz into your surprisingly chic new Crocs on the internet, wear them out on important errands
Go for lunch (oxtail special) at your favorite Dominican restaurant with your baby and an old friend
Spend 27.00 on bizarre headbands, sparkly bracelets and a bedazzled elephant pendant at the 2.99 accessory store
Make 2 trays of baked ziti- one for dinner and one to freeze for emergency rations during the May of Mayhem
Get quarters for laundry
Buy soymilk for a vegan friend who is coming over tomorrow to see you and your new apartment and unbeknownst to her- help you with laundry.
Blog about it

Days to May of Mayhem: 5

The Pacific- on HBO

2010-04-26T14:46:00.006-04:00

My husband insists I watch it.

It's a testament to the horror and futility of war.

It honors the vets and the human toll of needless violence.

It's very literary! Two of the main characters in it are soldier writers.

History can't be swept under the rug!

Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

You can't watch nothing but Glee, Arlaina.

But all day, all I can think of is that scene where the creepy guy is tossing pebbles into the dead Japanese soldier's skull and that horrible noise they made when the hit the brain slosh. Until I'm so depressed I can hardly stand it.

Plink.

Ugh.

No.

War.

God.

In other news... Days to May of Mayhem: 6

What (not?) to Wear

2010-04-23T15:40:00.007-04:00

I'm desperately searching for something to wear to the One-Story Debutante Ball. Have I mentioned this event? I want to look fabulous and playful but I also want to look like a real writer and not a gag. Also I had a baby 7 months ago and am not, er, 26. I think I found something but now the shoes are an issue. To tiara or not to tiara? Gloves? Gardenia? I was in Loehmann's yesterday with teenagers trying prom dress on over their jeans and today I was at Century 21 looking for shoes and ended up getting sheets and Diego bubbles and a crystal skull vase ($6.79) for our house. Thankfully, I grabbed a Village Voice on my way to the subway with my girls on the cover. I heart NYC.

DAYS TO MAY OF MAYHEM: 9

Thank you, Mr. LaValle...

2010-04-22T10:09:00.012-04:00

I have the honor- nay the privilege- of having one Mr. Victor LaValle do me the honor of "presenting" me at the One-Story Debutante Ball on May 21st. When I was first invited to be a debutante for what is sure to be the literary event of the decade, I was, to be sure, thrilled! Only then did they tell me that I needed to find an established writer who has been a mentor to me to take one night from their busy schedule to parade me down an aisle so I could curtsey and hawk my Young Adult novel that still has no name... This, dear reader, proved to be rather tricky. And then I thought of my old pal, Victor. While we were at Columbia together, he was a mysterious dreadlocked figure with scathing talent and a gigantic heart whose short stories had electrified the entire writing program. And now he is one of the most exciting and acclaimed novelists of our generation and he is going to present me at this crazy ball. And he lives in my neighborhood so, hopefully, we can share a ride uptown from Brooklyn. ! And I genuinely like him and have been inspired by him and think that we are a delightful match. And I can't wait and you should buy ALL of his books~!

DAYS TO MAY OF MAYHEM: 10

Ladies and gentlemen, children of all ages-

2010-04-20T13:00:00.006-04:00

- Step right up, Folks!

I am always shocked and delighted when I casually bump into people and mention that I just bought a new pair of shoes and they say "oh, yeah, the Crocs- saw that on your blog this morning." For real! I LOVE IT! I also love when people- some I do not even know!- comment on my little old blog here. It makes my freaking day, dude! So, I am reaching out to you, my dear readers- let me know what's up, click on the follow button and take a ride on the Tilt-a-Whirl that has become: my life...

Love and Rockets,

Arlaina

DAYS TO MAY OF MAYHEM: 11

MAY OF MAYHEM: Pre-party

2010-04-19T10:56:00.009-04:00

So I have arranged my life in such a way where I have precisely one month to finish the first edits on my YA novel. The month of May. THE MAY OF MAYHEM. This month of April has been dedicated to:

1. Getting the apartment in shape so the babysitter can find food and diapers with ease.

2.Purging my life of draining negativity- yes a tall order but life is short, goodness only please! (I know that is so Oprahnic but there you go).

3. Buying summer shoes before they are all sold out online and city-wide (See photos. The tattoo heart is a thing that goes on the Croc. Like, a shoe earring. Oh, you know what I'm talking about).

4. Getting ready emotionally and physically for The One-Story Debutante Ball!

5. Getting the baby to love Enfamil...

6. Reading edgy dark YA (Crash into Me, for instance) to prep me for my er, masterpiece.

7. Planning one giant trip to Ikea for kid furniture and a mirror or two.

8. Laundry.

May is also filled with friends' readings, A great big non-fiction Pen Parentis reading, One-Story Debutante Ball, Kentucky Derby, Mother's Day and medical bill paying... When I say mayhem I mean May Hem!

DAYS TO MAY OF MAYHEM: 12

The French!

2010-04-16T09:40:00.008-04:00

A friend of mine is in Paris, galavanting about in false mustaches and bangs, buying African art at French auctions, and living her artistic life in ways I can only dream of amid my boxes and baby food grinding. She implored me to find "someone trustworthy" to watch my baby so we could spend some quality friend time together and we will when she returns. I love that although we are both parents, we are not mommy friends, that she wants to escort me to the Otto Dix show at the Neue Gallerie, and that she knows of my obsession with Weimar Germany. In her honor and to celebrate the forthcoming arrival of my editor letter and my upcoming May of Mayhem in which I hire a full-time babysitter and write 125 pages of my book: I bought a fitted black blazer. I am wearing the shit out of it because it is awesome. I took it to the tailor down the street ala What Not to Wear so they could hem the sleeves and move the button. When I dropped it off, it felt like I was leaving my puppy at the pound. Bon Voyage!

Coming up for Air...

2010-04-07T22:04:00.000-04:00

Hello dear readers. I'm still up to my neck in boxes but after 2 sobering nights of Hoarders:Buried Alive was able to purge our new home of a Darth Tater Mr. Potato head box, a wool leopard shaped rug I bought with my first NYC paycheck 10 years ago, a hand-held egg beater from the 1940's, our old potato peeler I got at a drag queen Tupperware party and 0-3 month Onesies that were clogging the baby drawer. Oh. There is more. But I do what I can and am so delighted to be in a real live 2 bedroom that I can breathe in that I will do all I can to keep it light and open and er, roomy! Bring it!

And then I'll get to my 100 pages...

The Literary Debutante Ball: May 21, 2010

2010-04-01T23:23:00.000-04:00

Date:	Friday, May21,2010
Times:	7pm - 11pm
Location:	The Old American Can Factory 232 3rd St. Brooklyn, NY 11215
Tickets:	$50 each	The Literary Debutante Ball will celebrate One Story’s debut and emerging authors, with artists, performers, and filmmakers producing work inspired by issues of One Story. These original works will be displayed at the ball and will be auctioned off in the month following the benefit. The highlight of the ball will be the formal “presentation” of writers who have made their debuts in One Story. Each writer will be “escorted” by an established author. The presentation will be announced by John Hodgman (The Areas of My Expertise, The Daily Show). All proceeds will benefit One Story, a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization, and aid it in its mission to support the art form of the short story and the authors who write them. Tickets for the ball are $50 each. Sponsorship opportunities are also available. Benefit Committee: Michael Cunningham \| Elizabeth Gilbert \| Ben Greenman Virginia Lawrence \| Amanda Stern \| Katherine Minton \| Colson Whitehead Authors Expected to Attend Sam Allingham Andrew Foster Altschul Ramona Ausubel Nell Casey Dan Chaon Anne Corbitt Michael Cunningham John Hodgman Tamara Jenkins John Jodzio Amelia Kahaney Cheston Knapp Michelle Latiolais Grant Monroe Matthew Purdy Roxana Robinson Jim & Karen Shepard Terese Svoboda ARLAINA TIBENSKY!! Laura van den Berg Colson Whitehead

Moving

2010-03-15T13:17:00.003-04:00

We are moving yo. As I sat in our living room at 12:45 am last night, all my worldly possessions half packed all over every surface, watching Hoarders on TLC, I had an epiphany. NEED. TO. GET. RID. OF. SHIT... PS. This photo is not my apartment... yet.

100 pages

2010-03-11T08:32:00.009-05:00

100 pages isn't that many, right? If one were, say, a 15 year old with chicken pox and a typewriter and a lot going on and a lot of time on her hands- one could, ostensibly, have 100 pages of woe to add to the collection? Right? 100 pages. Friends, boyfriend, poetry, pregnancy?, snark and heartache...creative pursuits. 100 pages. There's chain smoking grandma stuff too, for sure, and an entire childhood to look back on... 100 pages. Just read an interview with Lorrie Moore in my Wisconsin alumni magazine and she said that writing about "coming of age" takes a lot of pages. 100 more pages than I already have? Um, yes. 100 more pages, actually. 1 0 0 m o r e p a g e s.

Tweet This

2010-03-09T07:45:00.010-05:00

My friends, colleagues and fans often ask me, if I'm "on twitter." My good friend and colleague, Kid Rock and I share similar views on Twitter and it is this: "If one more person asks me if I have a Twitter, I’m going to tell them, 'Twitter this shit, motherfucker. I don’t have anything to say, and what I have to say is not that relevant. Anything that is relevant, I’m going to bottle it up and then squeeze it onto a record somewhere." Yes it's a tool and publishing types are gaga over it but I swear, if I invite even one more piece of communicative technology into my life we will all suffer. Tweet Tweet Tweet. I too, like my pal Kid Rock, have some real writing to do...like this blog here.

Lorin Stein: Overacheiver

2010-03-05T23:19:00.006-05:00

Have you heard about Lorin Stein? Talented, ambitious, French-speaking bastard. 37 years old and to be the new editor of the Paris Review? So young! So accomplished! But has he ever written a first person young adult novel and nourished 2 babies for 5 months straight on breastmilk ALONE? Long ago, when he was alive, I got wasted on white wine at a book party at George Plimpton's house. The walls were dripping with whimsical caricatures drawn by oh, probably Picasso, Hirshfeld or W.C. Fields. The kitchen (where the wine was) was gigantic and filled with expensive pots and pans and thick white dishes. There were writers everywhere and some of them knew my name and couldn't wait to hear about what I was "working on" and who I was "studying with" and if I wanted "another glass of chardonnay." I thought that my life would be filled with hundreds and thousands of better and even more literary nights of debauchery. Little did I know that tipsy on a little corner couch, listening to him plink plonk on a baby grand, equally drunk with a fellow student would be a highlight of my so called literary life I would share, hardly ever, with anyone. Until now. Cheers Lorin- you firecracker.

The Balm of Environment

2010-03-04T13:38:00.009-05:00

I just read this great little piece on Paris' Shakespeare and Co. bookstore and it was all about the balm of environment. We are moving, that's right- moving- to a new apartment any minute now and I am overwhelmed with choices and prices of furniture and rugs and window shades, beds and rugs, chairs and bath mats, headboards and potholders. We need a new vacuum cleaner. How many books should we take out of storage? I work at home and bathe at home. Sleep, love, feed my family and play with my baby all in the same space. I want it to be inviting and calm, creative, and beautiful, timeless yet unique. A real home that takes the anxiety from your shoulders the moment you walk through the door. Oh dear reader, how the fuck do I pull it off? Say it with me- the balm of environment- Let's start with a bed for the 3 year old and take it from there.

Writers

2010-03-04T12:28:00.007-05:00

How I love them. I love how you can take a poetess, a romance writer, a Penthouse Letters writer, a Young Adult novelist, a memoirist, and dare I say a medical textbook writer- sit them all at a kitchen table with a pot of coffee and they will bond- bond I tell you!- over deadlines, point of view, inspiration, and their quest for immortality through the written word. For realz. Speaking of writing, I'm itching to get started on my next book but feel like it would be cheating on BELL JAR SUMMER until the edits are finished, my editor/s are beside themselves with glee and their eyes are glazed over with dollar signs. Now all I need is time time time time time time time time time time time time... Oh! And I FINALLY Got my Shelfari to work (Thanks Java script!) so if you have any books of note that I need to read or am forgetting all about remind me! And- if you have a question about any of them let me know... And if you want to buy a copy you can click on any book on my shelf and it will take you to a Shelfari page with an Amazon link at the left hand side of the page...

Suzie Townsend and Adrian Mole

2010-02-25T10:16:00.009-05:00

Suzie Townsend is my agent extraordinaire. Hmmm... You are thinking why is that name so oddly familiar? Is it because she is an amazing agent attached to some of the biggest YA deals of 2009 and 10? Is it because she has a wonderful reputation far and wide for her savvy, taste, and love of lilac? Yes! AND It is also because Sue Townsend is also the very same name of the author of one of the most amazing YA books of all time: The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole, aged 13 3/4. This may seem like a coincidence but the universe is paying very close attention. I think it is this book that subconsciously convinced me that it was OK to marry a Scotsman and now that I look at the whole thing, it had a major impact on my perception of YA, my love of teenager-dom, and the diary- all which inform so much of BELL JAR SUMMER. An orange soda toast, then to Suzie (and Sue) Townsend! CHEERS~!

Publishing Types

2010-02-25T10:06:00.004-05:00

This week I finally met the agent that plucked BELL JAR SUMMER from the slush pile and made me a millionaire. Not quite millionaire but he did rescue me from an un-published life which, for me, would have been a fate worse than death. He is not my agent now... he is a fancy editor with an office in the fabled Flatiron Building which is were I met him. Dear reader, it was like visiting Oz. Creepy security, elaborate elevators with hot shot editors chatting about book covers inside of them. So I get to his office and this is what is on his fucking wall. I KNOW!! So we hit it off and ate lunch and laughed a lot, about what I don't really remember, and I'm so grateful to the universe for introducing us. My new agent is a sparkly wonder and I will share more about her another time... All's I'm saying is thank you Brendan Deneen for everything. xx

Off With her Head!

2010-02-23T13:36:00.006-05:00

All this blogging nonsense is just until I get the edits for my forthcoming novel BELL JAR SUMMER. Oh, I have lots to do and I'm very anxious about what they (the EDITORS) have to say. It's all throat clearing, really. Maybe I'd blog about the whole writing/editing process if I had more to say. All I know is that when I see clutches of gothy teens skulking around 59th street I shiver in my boots thinking about them reading BELL JAR SUMMER. Especially the really cool, smart looking ones... they are the ones that will surely judge me... and send me to the punk rock gallows.

Oh and One More Thing

2010-02-21T13:07:00.005-05:00

Just in case you couldn't find them.

Last week I made a bed for my kid's lizards out of fake Tiffany's box, a piece of dishcloth and an old pillowcase.

2010-02-21T13:02:00.013-05:00

Because he wanted to sleep with the lizards and I didn't think that was such a good idea. Because I thought if the lizards had a place to take a nap, he would feel better about taking a nap himself. Because I have an MFA from Columbia University and knew I could whip up a lizard bed in three minutes and was up to the fucking challenge! Word to your mother. In the same spirit I made heart-shaped pancakes on Valentine's day- freeform. If there's a problem, yo- I'll solve it. Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it.

Hardcovers: The Glory and the Horror

2010-02-21T12:28:00.005-05:00

I have a hardcover book (yes, it's Going Bovine, yes I am loving it) that is about 800 pages long. I take it on the subway. I put it in my purse. I lug it from bedroom to living room to laundry room only to read 10 pages at a go. It's like take your brick to work week and I've had about enough. Oh, it's good. I love the cover. I love that I was so excited to read it I simply could not wait for the paperback edition that was sure to follow the hardcover release. I love how I feel like a 10 year old girl reading the library's copy of Little Women. But seriously. It's become my albatross and I'm itching to finish it, just to give my triceps a break. Oh, the kids today are all about the paperbacks, slide a copy into the back pocket of your dungarees on your way to the drag race or sock-hop and as a modern girl how can I blame them? I also seem to remember getting hardcovers from the library and they often had tiny paper-colored mites on them that you were never quite sure were real until you lightly smashed one with an index finger. And that they smelled like vanilla and the desert. Oh dear readers (all 3 of you), what was the last hardcover YOU read? I'm dying to know...

No, No, No, THANK YOU.

2010-02-17T13:26:00.010-05:00

There is a bakery in my neighborhood called Gideon's that has gotten into the coffee biz. Lest you forget, there are RULES for drinking coffee in the Heights.

MILK is kept in the REFRIGERATOR, PLEASE PUT IT BACK when FINISHED. THANK YOU
Do NOT pour any type of liquid into the garbage. Thank you for your assistance.
ATTENTION! NO REFILLS
NOBODY, BUT THE EMPLOYEES OF GIDEON'S, CAN TOUCH THE COFFEE MACHINE. ~THANK YOU

I have dreams about what went down there with the senior citizen clientele that warranted such excessive, yet oddly polite, signage. I'm thinking Barfly-esque, ear-ripping brawls over creamer, decaf, and inappropriate touching of the coffee machine. The punctuation, emphatic capitalization, and overall tone help transcend their function to art. Behold! ~THANK YOU~

2010-02-11T19:41:00.000-05:00

2CJM8R7SAZTR

Red Velvet

2010-02-11T11:46:00.004-05:00

Tomorrow they are having a Valentine's Day party at my kid's school even though it is only February 12. I'm making mini red-velvet cupcakes for him to bring. Red velvet makes me think of blood soaked earth, like someone took the soil from beneath the Roman Coliseum and made a cake out of it. But it's festive and full of cancer-causing red dye so, what's not to love? And I also think, what better way to celebrate love than with dangerous bloody cakes? And Spiderman Valentines? And a glass of wine in the tub while my husband makes a frozen pizza? Tomorrow will probably the very last time my son will distribute love notes to all his friends- girls and boys alike- without shame. I myself am full of love today- for snow, for my kids, my man, my friends, for beautiful words on a page. For the whole bloody adventure of it.

@(o)@ Koala Bear is Code for I Love You.

2010-02-04T15:57:00.011-05:00

A one-sided conversation with my super February 4, 2010:

"What the hell is texting?"

"Why wouldn't you just call the person?"

"When is typing easier than talking?"

"That's all the kids do now, typing on a phone when they should be eating dinner."

"I just don't get it."

Digital divide indeed.

@(*o*)@

Koala bear is code for I love you.

I Hate Jane Austen

2010-02-03T14:24:00.009-05:00

There. I said it. Oh- I respect her word-smithing, her plotting, and etc. but I'd rather argue with my insurance company over medical charges than curl up with Pride and Prejudice. In grad school I tried to write a paper comparing Jane Austen's books to Victorian pornographic novels and got a resounding "shame on you!" from none other than Lore Segal.

I also wrote a paper on Harriet the Spy for a Children's Literature seminar with Richard Howard. It was all about feminism and the power of the gaze- how Harriet becomes all children navigating through challenging times- blah blah blah. I thought it was pretty good. He didn't. He asked me why I would choose to concentrate on a second rate children's book when I could have written about Rudyard Kipling! Which, if you've ever met Richard Howard, is hilarious.

I guess what I'm getting at is that I don't love the things I'm supposed to and love the things I'm supposed to not. How punk rock.

Coffee, Inspiration, and the Roloff Dwarf Mom

2010-02-02T14:07:00.010-05:00

We bought the cheapo $3.99 French Roast in a bag coffee from Trader Joe's last week instead of the $6.99 Fair Trade Bolivian Blend in the can and, dear reader, learn from my cautionary tale. It's like drinking toasted gasoline and because we only have skim milk in the house I can take no refuge from its bitterness in butterfat. (One of the only things that the dwarf Roloff mom on TLC's Little people, Big World and I have in common is our loathing of skim milk.) I'm trying to get in the mood here to like, write, for Christ's sake and the coffee just isn't doing it for me. All I can think of is half and half and dwarves and laundry. And all the people I know who have published books. And Prince. And the low battery in my mouse. And what to make for dinner. You see? This is what the coffee situation has reduced me to.

A Perfect Day for Banana Fish

2010-02-01T15:24:00.009-05:00

As an official YA writer I am contractually obligated to discuss the passing of JD Salinger: genius, creep, possible Howard Hughes-esque own urine drinker. When I was 13, I read the Catcher in the Rye in one day. Could. Not. Stop. Reading. The velocity of the voice and the obsessive adoration of each and every word from Holden's mouth was no doubt, the inspiration for a zillion writers. But it is this very -OMG I can't put it down because [insert main character's name] is so totally me!- feeling that I aspire to in my own work, YA or otherwise.

Move me. And make it quick. Amuse and depress me simultaneously. Speak clearly and confuse me. And of course, what made Catcher in the Rye so amazing to me was that my mother: HATED IT. Wha? I know! I don't understand the loathing either. I think she just didn't get it. And then there was the whole murdering of John Lennon connection and that was it. Salinger will forever have a line through his name in my mother's book. As for me, I say a million thank yous, and adieu.

Sofa King Amazing

2010-01-30T08:59:00.014-05:00

So I have this book I wrote called BELL JAR SUMMER and I just sold it and am beside myself with incredulous glee! This is what Publisher's Marketplace announcement announced...in "New Deals":

"Arlaina Tibensky's BELL JAR SUMMER, the story of a fifteen year-old, whose parents are splitting up, whose boyfriend is trying to wrestle her out of her pants at every opportunity, and who's suffering through late onset chicken pox while languishing in the Chicago suburbs with only an ancient IBM typewriter, her chain-smoking grandmother, and her beloved well-worn copy of Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar to console her to Anica Rissi at Simon Pulse, in a pre-empt, by Brendan Deneen at FinePrint Literary Management."

In PRE-FUCKING-EMPT! Am I paying back my Columbia graduate school loans with the advance, ehm, no. But! A book that I wrote has found a home and people besides my friends who are obligated to prop up my fragile ego might actually read it.

What is so funny about all this book deal business is this:

The agent that brokered the deal (yes that Brendan Deneen) emailed his wanting to represent me on my birthday (12/16)
Simon Pulse made me an offer on my mom's birthday (1/14)
Libba Bray, the secret love of my life and the writer whose interview with Barnes & Nobel's "Meet the Writers" inspired me to try my hand at a YA book, released her masterpiece, Going Bovine, on my kid's birthday (9/22)
!!!

What I'm getting at is the universe has been trying to get me to follow this YA path down the rabbit hole and now that I have, I'm glad I listened. Did you know that I am the world's oldest sixteen year old? That this book flew from my brain onto the page? That I love this book more than I thought possible? That I myself had late onset chicken pox as a 15 year old one hot summer long ago?

Seriously, I was channelling it, like the midget in Poltergeist and then it was here in the world, this gorgeous monster and here I am, putting a leash on it and walking it around the streets of New York. Sofa king amazing.

More Than I Say Out Loud

It's November Already!

Skunks

On Freaking Fire!

And now a word about Scotland...

SIGH SIGH SIGH

More Evidence That I am the Geekiest Girl in the World

You, Moonface Tibensky, are no John Green

Winners! Rockers! Writers!

100th POST and a HUGE GIVEAWAY that is SOFA KING HUGE I Can Hardly Stand it!

It's Like a Birthday, but Weirder

Blog Tour! So Far!

And Then Things Fall Apart

by Arlaina TibenskyJuly 18th - August 12th

WHAT A BIZARRE AND LOVELY COINCIDENCE!

Books of Wonder! Tuesday, July 26, 6pm

UPTOWN LOVE! Tonight! 8-10pm Above the Bridge Summer Book Party

Reading tonight! At WordUp Community Pop-Up Bookstore...

Junior Library Guild Selection for Spring 2011

I'm Reading at the WordUp Community Pop-up Bookstore in The Heights!

Things Fall Apart: Achebe and Tibensky

Where's Your Spine?

What's on My Nightstand

Oh Book Cover

BTW I HAVE A BOOK COMING OUT JULY 26

On The Intelligence of Teens- The Smartest Most Alive People on the Planet

Alone is Where the Heart Is.

Lynda Barry: My Hero.

INVINCIBLE SUMMER: FTW

ROCK THE DROP!

Typewriters, AND THEN THINGS FALL APART, and Me

My items are up FRIDAY APRIL 1 at 4:00! NO JOKE!

Write Hope!

Japan and Japan and Japan

What Should I Wear, an Update

Literary Ladies: Or What to Wear to a Reading When You are the Reader

30th Follower...

NYC Teen Author Festival 2011!

I Blame the Bikram Yoga...

The Lamest of the Lame

Got Milk?

I'm Running Away to Join the Circus.

BONSAI!!!!

Geek Alert

I Am Alive...

Reading and Writing

Yes, there is a winner. No, I don't know what the prize is...

30th FOLLOWER GETS A PRIZE!

Sylvia Plath Inc.

My Other Car is a Bicycle

What's in a Name?

Oh, Johnny.

Ponderosa Stomp!

Contests

My Agent

Queer Divine Dissatisfaction

Truth Has a Name and it is Peter K Steinberg

I Should Be... Tweeting?

Sylvia Plath is Lavishly Apt

Great Literature Blows My Mind

To All My Friends!

Recycling Tarantulas and Sex Tapes

Why the Kendra Wilkinson Sex Tape Should Make You Angry

One Story Literary Debutante Ball, May 21 2010

Intrigued?

Literary Debutante Ball fashion advice from One Story’s Associate (Fashion) Editor:

I have copied and pasted this from One-Story's blog because it is hilarious, inspiring, and I am too busy dying my hair and writing to come up with my own blog material today...

Literary Debutante Ball fashion advice from One Story’s Associate (Fashion) Editor:

To Tantalize You...

NASHVILLE! Day 8 Item 11!

Sylvia's Library

A Collection of Brand New Sentences!

May of Mayhem is going Freaking Fast!

CAN'T

Libba, Stephen, and Harper Lee

The Bunker is Ready for the YApocalypse

The Pacific- on HBO

What (not?) to Wear

Thank you, Mr. LaValle...

Ladies and gentlemen, children of all ages-

by Arlaina Tibensky
July 18th - August 12th

@(o)@ Koala Bear is Code for I Love You.