One Story Literary Debutante Ball, May 21 2010

Here are some candid photos in no particular order from the most amazing night in Literary History! I bring you: The One-Story Literary Debutante Ball... Before I continue let me just say that I have never had such fun with writers. Graduate school was often a cauldron of ambition and jealousy. Oh we were friends and good ones, but underneath the camaraderie was a constant undercurrent of competition that kept your teeth on edge. That unpleasant buzz was gone from this event. Everyone looked beautiful. Everyone was happy. My good friend from grad school who is a successful writer has always said there was plenty of room for everyone who writes, and at the One-Story Ball for the first time in my entire writing life, I believed her.

This first one is my favorite. It's my mentor, pal, and escort of amazing-ness, Victor LaValle and me soaking up the applause of Mr. Jonathan Lethem. That little feather thing in the bottom right corner is my Pen Parentis partner MM De Voe's cocktail ring.

This lovely lady is none other than Ms. Elissa Schappel who looked resplendent in her red hair and retro garb. I was talking to her for about 15 minutes before I realized who she was, and forgot to tell her how much I admire her work... See, that was the whole thing about the event. Writers are not Brangelina. You don't know who is who unless you know them. Which I love. But which is also a little intimidating because one minute you are sipping Brooklyn Lager with a nice lady at the empanada station and next thing you know you have revealed all your breast feeding tips to an Academy Award-winnning screenwriter, aka Tamara Jenkins.

This is Alexis McGuinness. She played a moth in "Bar Joke, Arizona," Sam Allingham's story. I did not know this and thought she wore wings for the hell of it, which I thought was rad.

Revelers- all Pulitzer Prize nominees/winners

Vic. Tor.

He looked amazing and was so charming and great. I think the reason I had such a great time is because such a talented and take no prisoners artist had my back. A thousand thank yous, Mr. LaValle. I owe you a rotisserie chicken.

These two lovebirds are the literary power duo JT Petty and Sarah Langan. Don't they look great?

Yo DJ! My feet were killing me and so not much dancing. I love to dance. I just could not.

One-Story Editor Hannah Tinti and Webonair Devin Emke pose for snaps. Note Colson Whitehead in suit and tie.

This sparkly wonder is Ramona Ausubel who moments before the ball sold a story collection and novel. I know! She is tall and gorgeous and charming too. I hear she can write you under the table too so look out litterati- she's coming to get you and take all your prize monies.

This is Cheston Knapp and Sam Allingham. Two nicer gents I have never met. Writers are so funny. Self-depricating, ambitious, sensitive, envious, emotionally intelligent, bad with money. We are all walking conundrums. We spend our days washing dishes in restaurants to pay the rent and our nights typing on our laptops, pasty and wired on espresso till sun-up, so dressing us up and making us twirl for an audience was quite bewildering for us all- the boys especially. Except for Patrick Somerville- he loves to twirl.

One-Story gave these fake tattoos out a long time ago. This reveler knew to save hers for a special occasion... cool right?

I could have used a better bra, lost 20 pounds and gotten a good night's sleep but this is me at the Ball. I had a singular experience never to be forgotten and can't thank One-Story, Maribeth and Hannah, Master of Ceremonies John Hodgman, Mr. Victor LaValle, my Facinator-maker Heather in London, or my Darling Husband enough... It was a night to remember. You can always subscribe to One-Story or donate $$ to them and write it all off at any time...

I want now to mention all the Debutantes because they are all awesome and I loved spending time with them. We all had a lot in common and were all really different. I shall mention their escorts because they were great too...

Sam Allingham escorted by Dan Chaon

Ramona Ausubel escorted by Michelle Latiolais and Ron Carlson

Nell Casey escorted by Tamara Jenkins

Amelia Kahaney escorted by Michael Cunningham

Cheston Knapp escorted by Jim & Karen Shepard

Grant Monroe escorted by Jonathan Lethem

Patrick Somerville escorted by Hannah Tinti

Cote Smith escorted by Deb Olin Unferth

Here's a great Rumpus piece on the event.

And here's a Poets & Writers Link with VIDEO

And here's an Observer piece too.

Intrigued?

Literary Debutante Ball fashion advice from One Story’s Associate (Fashion) Editor:

I have copied and pasted this from One-Story's blog because it is hilarious, inspiring, and I am too busy dying my hair and writing to come up with my own blog material today...

Literary Debutante Ball fashion advice from One Story’s Associate (Fashion) Editor:

An image from Amy Vanderbilt's "How to be well dressed."

I’ve been asked to act as fashion godmother for anyone wondering what to wear to this Friday night’sLiterary Debutante Ball. I must assume this is because I own the complete set of Amy Vanderbilt’s “Success Program for Women,” and quote from its more illuminative tomes such as “Your European Vacation” and “How to Develop Poise and Self-Confidence” regularly.

Happily, there is no dress code for our literary ball. A straw poll reveals our staff is thinking cocktail dresses, sundresses and rompers for the ladies, blazers and ties over jeans, skinny jeans, khakis, or pants my grandmother would refer to as “slacks” for the gentlemen. The American Can Factory in Brooklyn is a fun and creative place, so you could arrive dressed as a slice of Swiss cheese and feel right at home. Unless someone else shows up dressed as one (heaven forbid).

Vintage prom dresses and tuxes, casual Friday office attire: all good! Be comfortable. Be brave. Do your best.

Even more happily, it doesn’t matter what you wear. What matters is whether you have a good heart and how many times you compliment the Associate Editor on her Swiss cheese costume.

Finally, I offer a few nuggets of fashion advice I’ve collected over the years:

“Glamour, always.” – Dita Von Teese

“Before you go out, take one piece of jewelry off.” – my grandmother

“Before I go out, I put one more piece of jewelry on.” – Kim Kardashian

“It’s always better to be overdressed than underdressed.” - Coco Chanel

“My mother taught us that it was always better to be underdressed than overdressed.” Audrey Hepburn’s son, Luca.

“It’s not the clothes, it’s how you wear them.” – Me, 1987

“You cannot go to school with Swatch watches in your hair.” – my mother, 1987

“We’re calling because your daughter came to school with Swatch watches in her hair and refuses to take them out. To make matters worse, after seeing her, several other girls have put their own Swatch watches in their hair. We can’t have that.” – my principal, 1987

“Don’t forget yourself—make sure of yourself!” Amy Vanderbilt’s Success Program for Women, How to Develop Poise and Self-Confidence.

“Nothing beats a nice pair of slacks.” – my grandmother

May of Mayhem is going Freaking Fast!

Yes, I'm doing it but it's taking me a while to get in the zone. And my frenemy the Internet, is being really passive/aggressive. Yes, it's a great research and networking tool, yes I'm getting important emails regarding my literary career, no I don't need to look up "Dubstep" on YouTube because a member of Arlainas Rule the World on Facebook told me to.

Ugh.

Meditating helps. I took this Media Bistro course eons ago about how to make time for writing and basically, the secret is meditating. Sitting down for 5-10 minutes with some kind of guided meditation to focus your creative brain was the instructor's big suggestion. And it so works.

Google "guided meditations" and you'll get a slew of mp3's for your ipod.

And I'm starting to FREAK THE FUCK out about my outfit for the One Story Debutante Ball on May 21st... I'm committed to the lurid and over the top fascinator now that the payment went through.

Dear Reader, do I have the balls to carry it off!?

Stay. Tuned.

CAN'T

TALK.

MUST.

WRITE.

Well, not really write, write. Read read read is more like it. And get permissions set up and laid out for my agent.

Meanwhile, I'm in convo with a British Etsy seller about a fascinator for the One-Story Debutant ball...

What (not?) to Wear

I'm desperately searching for something to wear to the One-Story Debutante Ball. Have I mentioned this event? I want to look fabulous and playful but I also want to look like a real writer and not a gag. Also I had a baby 7 months ago and am not, er, 26. I think I found something but now the shoes are an issue. To tiara or not to tiara? Gloves? Gardenia? I was in Loehmann's yesterday with teenagers trying prom dress on over their jeans and today I was at Century 21 looking for shoes and ended up getting sheets and Diego bubbles and a crystal skull vase ($6.79) for our house. Thankfully, I grabbed a Village Voice on my way to the subway with my girls on the cover. I heart NYC.

DAYS TO MAY OF MAYHEM: 9

Thank you, Mr. LaValle...

I have the honor- nay the privilege- of having one Mr. Victor LaValle do me the honor of "presenting" me at the One-Story Debutante Ball on May 21st. When I was first invited to be a debutante for what is sure to be the literary event of the decade, I was, to be sure, thrilled! Only then did they tell me that I needed to find an established writer who has been a mentor to me to take one night from their busy schedule to parade me down an aisle so I could curtsey and hawk my Young Adult novel that still has no name... This, dear reader, proved to be rather tricky. And then I thought of my old pal, Victor. While we were at Columbia together, he was a mysterious dreadlocked figure with scathing talent and a gigantic heart whose short stories had electrified the entire writing program. And now he is one of the most exciting and acclaimed novelists of our generation and he is going to present me at this crazy ball. And he lives in my neighborhood so, hopefully, we can share a ride uptown from Brooklyn. ! And I genuinely like him and have been inspired by him and think that we are a delightful match. And I can't wait and you should buy ALL of his books~!

DAYS TO MAY OF MAYHEM: 10

MAY OF MAYHEM: Pre-party

So I have arranged my life in such a way where I have precisely one month to finish the first edits on my YA novel. The month of May. THE MAY OF MAYHEM. This month of April has been dedicated to:

1. Getting the apartment in shape so the babysitter can find food and diapers with ease.

2.Purging my life of draining negativity- yes a tall order but life is short, goodness only please! (I know that is so Oprahnic but there you go).

3. Buying summer shoes before they are all sold out online and city-wide (See photos. The tattoo heart is a thing that goes on the Croc. Like, a shoe earring. Oh, you know what I'm talking about).

4. Getting ready emotionally and physically for The One-Story Debutante Ball!

5. Getting the baby to love Enfamil...

6. Reading edgy dark YA (Crash into Me, for instance) to prep me for my er, masterpiece.

7. Planning one giant trip to Ikea for kid furniture and a mirror or two.

8. Laundry.

May is also filled with friends' readings, A great big non-fiction Pen Parentis reading, One-Story Debutante Ball, Kentucky Derby, Mother's Day and medical bill paying... When I say mayhem I mean May Hem!

DAYS TO MAY OF MAYHEM: 12