Thursday, July 26, 2012

Midsummer Nights Dream! Thanks NYFA

She was amazing... wish I got her name!
Sometimes I do things without thinking too much about them and other times I think so effing much I am paralyzed with thoughts and decisions.  This summer has been a real challenge.  First off, I have had my kids with me for most of the summer which has been amazing (Bronx Zoo Camp and writing at the zoo) and annoying (weeklong Beyblade anime festival on our couch).  

We had also been planning on  packing up the circus of our NYC life and moving to a charming house in New Jersey.  We were very excited and very nervous.  Every day at about 10:30 I started weeping in a snot-filled hiccuppy, post partum depression levels way about leaving and let the tears flow for 2 hours.  Then I'd pull myself together and watch Beyblades.  We had a mid August closing date and a picture of the house on our kitchen table to gaze upon as we ate fish tacos for dinner.

Around the fourth of July we realized that the house had some major issues we weren't comfortable with and the deal fell through.  So hard.  So adult.  We are keeping our heads up and will most likely make a move within the next 12 months.  Now that I know we are here for a while and taking a break the tears have STOPPED~! The depression is slowly lifting!

Perhaps we weren't quite ready?  Perhaps the universe was telling us something we refused to listen to for months.  Like falling in love, it's not supposed to be this hard.  It wasn't meant to be and etc. and I believe it.  Our house is out there for us and we are going to find it.
Dangling by a string- never a better metaphor for being alive.

But here is the thing.

Exactly at the same moment this whole housing thing was exploding in our hands I get an email from the New York Foundation of The Arts and lo and behold I won a grant!  That I wasn't even going to apply for because I was so busy and depressed! 

I know!

I am so grateful and encouraged and honored to be in such great company.

And here is a list of my fellow fiction fellows and click here to learn more about the amazing NYFA 

Denise Burrell-Stinson (New York) 
Alexandra Chasin (Kings) 
Kiera Coffee (Kings) 
Susan Daitch (Kings) 
B.G. Firmani (New York) 
Scott Geiger (New York) 
Melinda Goodman (New York)
Susan Karwoska (Kings) 
Mary La Chapelle (Westchester) 
Catherine Lacey (Kings) 
Caron Levis (Kings) 
Sara Lippmann (Kings) 
Minju Pak (Kings) 
Bob Proehl (Tompkins) 
Thaddeus Rutkowski (New York) – Gregory Millard Fellow
Amanda Stern (Kings) 
Allison Thompson (Kings) 
Arlaina Tibensky (New York) 

And they had a cocktail party for us and I met a real life Czech Puppeteer named Vit Horejs who is very tall with long white hair and very serious.  I drank delicious beer and ate delicious salsa in a ridiculous snake skin printed caftan my kids picked out because it made me look like a snake guy from Ninjago.  So my husband's all chit chatting with Vit and he says to Vit, "Oh!  You're a Czech puppeteer?  Let me get my wife!"  He knows me so well.

There was a magnificent burlesque dancer!  Tasty food!  People who love and appreciate the arts!  I hate drama but seem to attract it.  Camp has started.  I have a little time to myself to think and write and move ever onward!

Ok.  That's us caught up.  More soon.  I promise.


No comments: